quebec-2k-sorry-for-b-tching
Title: quebec-2k-sorry-for-b-tching
Author: Dominic "Decktech" Gaudreault
Date: Mar 28, 2000
Ok, I am frustrated. Anyway , this is the report about my bullsh*t Quebec Championship Tournament with f*cked up pairing. Everything was going bad, my girlfriend had just left me because I was too gentle ??? WTF... anyway, she was crazy. My walkman had ran out of batteries. I had forgotten how to track destiny. I had broken my phone by throwing it at my window and I had just gotten a new acne pimple. All my decks looked crappy, except for my dark Sabacc deck. But still, there was one good thing. I had persuaded everybody I was going to play ROPS. But I was planing on playing Sabacc. The week before, I had playtested the Sabacc deck, and it was winning to everything by 40+ but losing to Throne Room deck badly (Even with Imperial Supply). I thought a lot of people would go Throne Room , so I play what everybody thought I would play, ROPS. Ahhh, I am ridiculous.
Oh yeah , 1 day before the tournament , I still had no light side deck. So , I built an untested, Throne Room Deck. It did not look that bad , I knew I had a good chance against HDADTJ, and ROPS. Friday, we were supposed to playtest, but we wasted our times doing nothing. I slept 2 hours, because of a Stupid Pokemon tournament. (Don't worry I borrowed some cards). I finished second, any my prize was a Humpty Dumpty Salt&Pepper chip. That's pretty dumb. Then, that night we were still supposed to playtest, but we playtested Young Jedi instead??? My dark deck was a crappy Darth maul deck with droids, and my light side deck was a Jedi Master deck with 1 of each different Jedi (yes, that's 12 red cards :) (with no shield). Those decks are the gayest decks you will ever see, but I had made them to make people laugh at me. So , I slept another 2 hours. YJ was in the morning, and SWCCG, in the afternoon.
The day of the tournament I decide to put a sticker with the word 'SCRUB' on my necklace, and another on my zipper. Because , I am a scrub. Anyway, YJ is all about luck. Unfortunately, I pull out a masterful move with my 2 big pile of Jedi & Sh*t deck, and finish second. HAHAHA, I AM RIDICULOUS. I was not too confident in my SWCCG deck, so I decide to keep the word 'SCRUB' on myself. Ok, guys, here are my 2 decks. You may call the decks, Piles if you prefer :)
DARK SIDE:
'Why JU Is Bad For My Swccg Skills'
Objective (1)
Raltiir opperations / In the hands of the empire
Locations (12)
Raltiir
Forest
Jungle
Desert
Swamp
Courscant
Kashyyyk
Meditation chamber
Ice plains
Death Star
Wampa cave
Dagobah cave
Characters (16)
Darth Vader, Dark lord of the Sith
Darth Vader
Lieutennant Commander Ardan
Lieutennant Cabbel
Officer Evax
Admiral Ozzel
DS-61-2
IG-88 with Riot Gun
Navy trooper vesden
Lieutennant Arnet
AT-ST pilot x3
Comander Igar
Grand Moff Tarkin
Mara Jade
Vehicles (8)
Tempest scout 1
Tempest scout 2
Tempest scout 3
Tempest scout 5
Tempest scout 6
Blizzard scout 1
Blizzard 2
Tempest 1
Starships (6)
Devastator
Bossk in hounds tooth
Boba Fett in Slave 1
Zuckuss in Mist Hunter
Executor
Dengar in Punishing 1
Effects (8)
Sandwirl
Bad feeling have I
Imperial arrest order
Oppressinve enforcement
Imperial Decree
Secret Plan
There be hell to pay x2
Interrupts (10)
Alter x2
Twi-Lek Advisor (Signed by a guy from decipher, he wrote I am The King, Sean Smeallman :)
Trample
Shocking Revelation
Imperial Barrier
Evader
Monnok
Masterful Move
ps: Thanx Martin
pps: filing a Raltir command card decklist is very painfull, there is no double !
LIGHT SIDE DECK
'Why JU Dump My F*cking A$$'
Objective (0)
I SAID I HAD 0 OBJECTIVE !!!!!
Starting (3)
Farm
Swamp
Yavin 4: Massassi Throne Room
Location (7)
Yavin 4 Massassi War Room
Endor Chief Chirpa Hut
Yavin 4 Massassi Ruins
Yavin 4 Massassi Headquarter
Rendez Vous Point
Dagobah Yoda's Hut
Tatooine Obi-Wan's Hut
Nudj (2)
Nudj x2
Character 13
Obi-Wan Kenobi x3
Luke With Lightsaber x3
Chewbacca
Figrin Dan
Orrimarko
Han with Gun x2
Leia With Gun x2
Starship (1)
Millennium Falcon
Effect (11)
Revolution x3
What Are You Trying To Push On Us !!! x2
Do Or Do Not
Order To Engage
Civil Disorder
Wise Advice
Bacta Tank
Projection Of A Skywalker
Interrupt (23)
Courage Of a Skywalker
Swing And A Miss
Glancing Blow
It Could Be Worst x2
Out Of Commision x3
Carefull Planing
Shocking Information x3
The Signal x2
Tunnel Vision x3
On The Edge x3
Nabrun Leids x2
I Know
Ok, those are my decks. I don't like them anymore ! There were 48 player (unfortunately, I only got 2 Max Rebo, some a$$hole wanted a Mara Jade for 1). It was a 3 round tournament. Oh yeah, Revo was a good Idea. So, here are my game descriptions by a Scrub :)
Game 1 : My Ls Revo Deck Vs Steven McCormick (1500) HDADTJ with TIE fighter. Starting Oppressive Enforcement.
First Turn, I put 1 site, 2 Nudj, and I Revo his Meditation Chamber. He activate 2, put down Wakelmui and SFS. He draw 2 card , one of them is the Death Star ??? My Turn, I put down Do Or Do Not, Luke To Executor, and I move him to cancel Visage. I draw the Millennium Falcon. He activate and say go. I drain him for 2 , he loses 1 from hand , and 1 from reserve deck. POW, Kiffex. I was happy. I put down Figrin Dan with Luke, and I draw some crap. He deploys 3 Tie Fighter , Retrieves Kiffex, and replace them with a squadron. My turn , I Lose Figrin Dan's wager. And draw some more cards, but no goddamn character. He put down Vader to Meditation Chamber, Presence Of the Force there, and Alter the Revolution. My turn , I loose 1 more Figrin's wager. But, I drew a good bunch of characters. On his next turn , I think He draws. On my next turn, I lose another Figrin's Wager... I Revo Wakelmui, deploy my Falcon, Han, Chewi, and OTE. I attack his squadron, He Talon Roll, I grab it, yes, it's a draw :) Now, battle destiny, I draw 2 destiny of 2, and he reduce them to 0 with the HDADTJ objective. Ah damn, that's so gay. He Draw a destiny because of Vader, and he All Power to weapon his @#$%. So, I am the one losing Force ! I feel cheated !!!. I move Figrin and Luke in front of Vader. I draw Bacta Tank (Aleluia, Aleluia). He deploy some Dreadnot and TIE. He attack at both places. Vader get Slash, but he choke figrin, and kill Luke. This Time, My Falcon kill some stuff. I ITCBW for like 4 and Lose Han (I have Another In Hand). On My Turn, I put back Luke in the Executor , and Han in his Falcon. I attack with the Falcon. And Clean The Site with some track destiny, or maybe luck, who knows :) I move the Falcon to the Death Star, for some drain, because he was canceling the one on the Executor with Dreaded Imperial Starfleet. He put down Kashyyyk and Endor , and draw. Luke Feel Lonely, so Orrimarko went to visit him, while Leia appeared in the Falcon's bathroom. On His Turn, he Lateral Damage my falcon, and put a lot of power in front of it. He attack, and I play ITCBW for like 10, or something. Meanwhile, I was retrieving with On The Edge. From that point, the only good thing he did was choking Luke , and Beating the crap out of Orrimarko with Vader. My 2 Big Drain, my OTE, and my Civil Disorder were crushing him.
FW 2+ 31 (2 +31)
Highlights: Making me realize that SWCCG is MUCH better that YJ. Drawing my only Falcon fast, and making a draw in that talon roll. Oh yeah, no Evader :)
Downfalls: Hmmm, when he draw his Death Star in the 2 card he activated. And I forgot OTE once.
Game 2: The 'I can't drain' ROPS deck Vs Dominic Bouchard (5th in my Region) Tessek and Operative Deck starting UH-OH, with device and Baraguin.
I start Imperial Decree. We are pissed we have to play each other already. I got no 2/0 sites for the first couple of turn. We both just draw and deploy some red stuff till about turn 3. He flip his objective with 3 ITHORIAN (what a lucky bastard)!!!! I flip my objective with some good defense on my planet. He drain me for 6, ouch, I loose my 2 Alter!!! and deploy Obi and a Operative to his desert. On my turn , I sandwhirl Obi, and meet the requirement for Imperial Decree. On his turn, He drain me for 3, ok, that's a little better. Then, I pay 2 force, and search my deck for Vader Choke. In 10 cards, all my destiny were above 2 , except for Ozzel and the Vader I took. I attack a Operative and a Ithorian with Vader, and I draw that MOTHER F*CKING OZZEL. Ahhh, he only lost the operative. That was HUGE, that would have made him permanently remove 1 of his 3 Ithorian (his only way to drain). And made him lose 8 more force. On his turn , he put a Operative back , and deploy Bacta Tank. He beat the hell out of Vader with Luke, I loose 10 more force. On my following turn, I deploy Blizzard 2, Blizzard scout 1, Arnet, Evax. I trample the Operative ( he grab) and Inflict 20 battle damage to the lone Ithorian. Later in the game, I deploy Kashyyyk, and Tempest 1 with Igar (They got wack). It was just idiot, at each battle he was losing a operative to the tank, then he was putting him back, while retrieving one force. I try to control the farm to drain, but all my stuff got kill. My stupid drain of 1 at Kashyyyk was useless thanx to his Baraguin.
FL 0 -7 (2+ 24)
Highlights: That game just pissed me off.
Downfalls: I am f*cking pissed, I lost!!! My never choke Vader certainly did not help me. THAT WAS THE ONLY OPERATIVE WITH ITORIAN DECK THERE, WHY DID I HAVE TO PLAY IT ???
Game 3: The pissed off Dom ROPS sh*tty deck VS A f*cking slow mofo playing Profit starting Insurrection and playing with no docking bay or A2 Rebel :) (Probably 1200 rating)
That guy was as slow as a goddamn turtle. He was hardly able to speak any language, and he did not know any 'advanced' ruling, so the tournament director was always answering question. I start Bad Feeling. I draw Coruscant and a bunch of Imperials in my starting hands, then I draw another 2/0 site. He draw. I put my sites , and draw some more. He draw again. I play Masterful Move, he try to convince me he can cancel it with Transmission terminated. Hmmm, 5 minutes later , I search my deck for that Monnock used that I immediately play. He ask me what It does ! Ahhh, I say forget that, keep your sh*t. I flip my objective and deploy Zuckus In Ship at Kashyyyk. He put a Projection of a Skywalker, to the swamp. I immediately Alter It, but he Senses it ??? WTF, scrub should not have the right to play with SAC. Anyway, It goes in my used pile thanks to Oppressive Enforcement, I play Shocking Revelation. He deploy Orrimarko to the Audience Chamber, and Boutch On my planet. On my turn, I put Choke Vader and Tarkin, attack, I choke Orrimarko, and draw 7 for destiny. He loose Han and some more... I put some walker all over Tattooine. Now comes the fun part. That Fu*k deploy Scramble, And attack my walker with a pilot in it. He tell me I don't draw battle destiny because the pilot does not add his ability. I tell him that he is not present at the site , so Scramble does not work. Then I tell him that the AT-ST pilot can draw a battle destiny if not able to otherwise. He said NO. I tell him he was a stupid bit*h. I was tired of calling the judge, so for some battle , I was not drawing battle destiny :) Later, he put Another Han. I activate all except 2. I knew that there was 1 Alter , and 1 IG-88 with gun in my 2 card reserve deck. I get IG-88. I attack, and shot Han to the used pile. He said you must capture it ??? I try to convince him that I could do that. Anyway, I call the judge , and tell him to explain him all those ruling. Meanwhile, I tried to sleep, but, there was too much noise. Ok, I shot him to the used pile. And that game was over, what a a$$hole.
FW 2 +19 (4+43)
Highlights: Hmmm, I guess I could say playing a scrub, but...
Lowlights: Man, that piece of sh*t was so slow, that now I fell so tired, I want to go sleep.
Game 4: My Ls On The Edge Deck Vs Maxim Briand's(1750) HDADTJ with Much Anger In Him, and Responsibility Of Command, starting IAO.
I wanted to beat him because he always win at arm wrestling against me :( But, unfortunately, my starting hands was all red with 1 Nudj, and no Tunnel Vision. At least I had Do or Do Not. Dammit, that is gay. I almost show him my hand after deploying my 2 Nudj on my first turn. He was like, oh God, you are lucky.... On his turn, he deploy the Executor and Death Star Docking Bay. At the end of my next turn , after still drawing some crap, he loose to Visage from top of reserve deck. Responsibility of Command. Hmmm, Ok, I will probably lose, my only chance is to suicide my guy in a off the edge... But he play with sense, so... He deploy Vader to the Death Star Docking Bay. On my Turn, I Revo the Meditation Chamber, draw some good card, and keep 3 force for my Grappler. He drain me for 1 and keep his force in his force pile. On my Turn, I deploy Luke and Han to the Executor, and cancel Visage. Now, I tell myself that its Leia with Luke. I forgot it was Han. He deploy the Hoth War Room, Much Anger In Him, and Responsibility Of Command on Luke. Tarkin in front of Luke and Leia(Han), and the Visage back. On my turn, I Tunnel Vision for a 2nd On The Edge. Ok, he have 0 force left, and I got 1 Grappler and 2 On The Edge. So, If he Sense my first one, I grab his Sense, and play my second. He got no Sense, and he tell me I was lucky... ok, from his point of view, I was lucky :) So, Luke fell off the Executor, but still, I thought it was almost useless because Leia could not attack Tarkin because of the sh*tty Objective, and I had no Obi wan or Luke to Flip back the Objective. So when I remove Luke, I saw It was Han :) Yeah ! I deploy Chewi, attack, Han miss Tarkin, and draw a 0 and a 2 for Destiny :( Anyway, he play Ghyyk. I had no Character in my hand, I draw my remaining cards, and now , I have Luke, Obi, Orrimarko, and Leia. I don't have 3 force left, so he play Evader. On his turn, he deploy Mara Jade and her lightsaber to my farm. On my Next Turn, I decide to deploy Luke to Hoth, so that the Objective stays unflip, and to have a better drain. Well, I think that's what I did, but now that I think about that, I am wondering why I did not try to kill mara with Luke. Hmmm, I think its because I lost a lot of 5 destiny card in early drain. On his next turn , he only drain with Vader, he probably fear Lost In the Wilderness on Mara. Zuckuss Kill Luke, but I miss the slash. Well, the good thing about that is that it made me track a destiny of 5 . So, on my next turn , I deploy Leia and Obi in front of Mara. I gun her a$$, and he loose some force, while I only loose Leia. I think I also deploy Civil Disorder. On his next turn, he warp Vader back into his hand. I was not draining for much because of CHYBC. Then, he deploy the Holotable (so, he could stop losing force to Civil Disorder by redeploying his Monnok). I deploy Orrimarko where Obi-Wan is. After , Vader came to kill Ben. I play Swing a Miss and Draw a 5. I loose Orrimarko. He lost Vader. On my next turn , I wanted to kill that Monnock. I activate all except 2. Then, I realize that I SUX. I had forgotten, if it was my 5 destiny or my Swing and a Miss. Oh god, I cant believe I play that bad. I Tunnel Vision for Projection of a Skywalker. Then, I attack that Monnok, and I draw that Swing And A Miss... I am really homosexual. Well, that was about game, now I had 2 battleground for CHYBC, and I drain him to death.
FW 2 +15 (6 +58)
Highlights: I don't know , Even tho I sux , I think I made some good move in that game.
Downfalls: Well, I was really tired. And pretty depress, so being 3-1 made me think I had a chance, if I got paired with a 4-0 people, because there was 3 guy with 4-0, unfortunately no, my differential sucked a$$...
It was 5:00pm and we finally had a break to go eat. That made me realize again that Yannick is a Goddamn food eating machine !!! He eat 4 times what I eat, and finish before me !!! what a Pig :)
Highlights: Its unbelievable how much food Yannick can put in his mouth at 1 time :)
Downfalls: I lost 1 of my SCRUB sticker :(
Game 5 : My LS beatdown deck VS Steeve Corneau (8th in Region) HDADTJ Big Blue style, starting Bad Feeling Have I.
That guy was really cool. I had never talk to him before, but he was really friendly. Oh yeah, his girlfriend was also damn pretty. Hey , don't worry , I am not in need of sex that much :) When I drew my starting hand , I was like WTF ??? I drew Obi-Hut, Revolution, 2 EPP Luke, 2 Han, Leia, Obi :) I play my Revo on his Executor, my Nudj, and I draw another Leia ??? PLZ don't play monnok! He used his 5 first turn trying to find some sites. Then , he put 2 Endor site. Meanwhile, I had Revolutionize his Meditation Chamber, And cancel his Visage with Luke. He put down U-3P0, I Nabrun Leids Luke to Endor Back Door. He had like 20 force stack, so Han and Leia came out to have a Orgy with Luke. But Vader Premiere, his Lightsaber foil, 4 Lom with Bazooka, Tempest something and a pilot ruin the fun they had. He play you are beaten on Han, before the battle, to still have the first action with 4 Lom. I have 4 force left, so I say, I am gonna reply to that action, I try to Nabrun Leids, but I draw a 5... that sucks @#$%. I use swing a miss to prevent Leia from being forfeit 0 by Vader, then, she gunshot 4-Lom. 4-Lom had made Luke forgotten how to use a his saber. He draw a 1 for destiny, I draw a 5. So, he loose the pilot and 4-Lom, while I loose Leia and I ITCBW 3-4 force. On my next turn, I deploy Obi-Wan and Leia came back from her grave. I also deploy Do or Do Not (useless) and Bacta Tank. Vader is hit, and I loose Obi to the tank. I start to draw, meanwhile, he was activating his force for his next turn. He pay 6 force (you wonder why:), then I say, wait, my turn is not over yet :) He said, yeah, I know. I play Out Of Commission, there was 18 card in his lost pile, hehe, I got Vader. I am really a Cocksucker. I drain him for 3, he loses 3 Vader from hand :) After that Fozek came abord another Blizzard to Yavin 4. I deploy Figrin Dan, and draw a Tunnel Vision I had tracked in a battle. I play 2 ITCBW on his drain of 3. Next turn, Figrin Dan scam him, and I tunnel vision for Nabrun Leids. I beat the hell out of his guy. Then, he deploy some undercover spy to slow me down. But, my Civil Disorder was making him loose force, Then, I split up my guys everywhere. I did some On The Edge, and Figrin retrieve all my Lost pile. I had all my 7 2/0 sites on table, and most of my guys, so...
FW 2 +28 (8 +86)
Highlights: Putting Vader out of the game.
Downfalls: None.
Ok, I am 4-1, Yannick Is 5-0 and Klamatomot is also 5-0. I was wishing very badly to play Klamatomot, he should not be 5-0 but he only played scrub, so maybe, I could finish 2nd. Unfortunately, I have the highest differential of the 4-1 on my side, so I play Yannick, while Klamatomot play another scrub...
Game 6: The lucky ROPS deck vs Yannick Lapointe (NUMBER 1 in my Region)drain too fast for my me Throne Room Deck.
Well, my starting hand is godlike : Blizzard 2,Blizard scout 1,Ardan(free in bliz 1),Vader, Hoth Ice Plain, Death Star, Imperial Decree, Sandwhirl. He got a average start. He deploy Twas Kha and Figrin Dan to my Jungle. Blizzard 2 and Evax came and Kill Figrin. Then. he move Twas Kha to my desert, and draw. I put walker and Imperial all over my planet. I play sandwhirl, Twas Kha is missing. My objective flip. On his following turn, he deploy all his CC sites, Deploy Luke, and Pucumyr Trys. On my next turn, I deploy Vader to try to Kill pucumy Trys. But he play Path of Least Resistance(duh:)( I just wanted to see if he would play a ITCBW of 10, or Path:) On his following turn, he deploy a EPP hit squad, play Run Luke Run and I loose Vader plus 22 I think. That made me loose all my 6 starship, so I could not do Imperial Decree. Now, He was draining like a mad on Cloud City, and my Walker were useless. I manage to Beatdown. Orrimarko with Ig-88 and Igar in his tank. At the end, It was just a drain race witch I lost.
Highlights: My starting hand was pretty good.
Downfalls: I had not foreseen the EPP beatdown, even if he had 20 card in his hand, and was able to activate all his reserve deck, I SUX!
FL 0 -5 (8+81)( Really, really Gay)
Dammit, that's f*cking stupid, that lost knocked me off to 8th place. The pairing were so f*cked up. I really feel cheated, man 8th place mean I really blow sh*t. It really should have been a 8 game tournament. Even tho, I was unprepared for that tourney, and It was my biggest tournament ever, I feel really bad and frustrated about going 4-2. So, now I really feel like a Scrub. I think I am gonna wear a Scrub sticker at every tournament I go in from now on, and I am not kidding !!!
Here is the final standing.
1-The Crusher
2-Klamatomot (He play to 6 Scrub) (Yes, Francis, that Include you :)
3-Frederica Peloquine (Francis's Girlfriend)
4-Raphael Asselin (the YJ champion, hahahahah ;P
5-A F*cking Unknown Scrub
6-Frazin Zoukini
7-Ti-Gars
8-My A$$
9-I dont give a Fu*k
So, at least, Yannick Is the Quebec Champion, and that's cool. Hey, Klamatomot, your lucky you did not had to play me. The tournament was run really well by Bravo something Patrick Dinelle, even tho the pairing sucked. The prize support was 1 pack of Reflection and got 2 Captain Han. Oh yeah, there was Francis Lalumiere from Decipher, why was that guy there anyways ??? He had a camera to take picture, but he refuse to take my picture ! Who does he think he is ??? I AM DOMINIC, THE COOLEST GUY IN THE WHOLE WORLD !!!