nashville-gs-11-11
Title: nashville-gs-11-11
Author: Clint "GameMaster" Hays
Date: Sep 13, 2000
Clint Hays travels home from his temporary home in Knoxville, Tennessee to visit the friendly confines of his friend Steven Lewis domain. Clint had been talking to TJ Holman and Chris Praskac(who will forever be known to us in Tennessee as Chris Prasnatch) about coming down to his back yard to play some star wars. During the conversations Clint had been unsure of whether or not to play and he said as much. Apparently Prasnatch decided to leave Clint in the dark.
Friday Clint drove home to Nashville. Clint met Steven at his favorite restaurant, Emperor of China, to eat some good ole chinese buffet. As always, the two made the journey to DQ immediately after to talk some tech. Clint began to freeze his ass off so he and Steven left and went over to Stevens house to play some cards. The decks that Clint had were not that great. As always Clint helped Steve prove how not-broken Steve’s decks were. Clints other friend the Yellow Menace was supposed to be coming by sometime around 9:30, but called and canceled. He said something about how he had people stayin with him. Clint told him to just come on over and he and Clint could play some games, but he did not like Clint’s idea.
Clint and Steven continued to play some games for a few hours when Steven suggested to Clint that Clint forego the trip home overnight since Clint would be coming right back the next day. Clint agrees, so Clint and Steven watched some old episodes of ST:TNG which happens to be one of their favorite shows. The episode in question was a 2-parter so Clint and Steven left after part 1 to go get the Brownie. At this point is was 3:00 AM. The Gay Dennys was packed at this hour with mostly freaks and other @#$%in @#$%s. Steven did the honor of saying "2 of these", and the Brownies are shortly no more. Clint and Steven go back to Stevens place to watch part two of "Redemption", and to work on Clints decks. Steven has convinced Clint that his revolution deck is good, and Clint decides to play ties and revolutions.
Clint then wakes up to Stevens friend Mark in the shower. Damn. Mark was in the shower for 30 minutes. When Mark came out of the shower he looked like Yoda.
Clint and Steven then drove to the tournament. When Clint got there he decided not to play once again. Clint took a command card just in case. After discussing the situation with TJ Holman Clint decided to play afterall.
Clints decks were as follows
Dark Side: Monkey ties with a couple of changes. Clint added 2 Merrejks.
Light Side: Hidden Base with Revolutions which Clint will be posting later today.
Game 1
Light side vs Josh Kozuira BHBM
On his first turn Josh gets the Endor:DB and deploys the Emperor there. Clint searches for two generals. On his first turn Clint puts Crix Madine to the Home One:DB and searches for a scout. Next turn Josh puts Mara Jade with gun to the Endor Docking Bay. Clint drops Blount and Obi to the Emperors Playpen to start up a drain. Josh deploys Zuckass in mist hunter to endor. Clint beats that down with some ships. Josh gets Janus to the emperor to drain for three. Clint decides to pull big luke from reserve and Clint deploys him to help obi-wan. Clint moves luke and his gun to the death star docking bay. Josh captures Luke with Vader after Clint alters Presence of the Force. Josh moves Vader over with Ozzel to stop a drain. Clint deploys order to engage, Orrimaarko, Tawws Khaa, and Melas and Clint commences the beating. The game ends shortly there after thanks to many nice drains after Luke is freed.
2(+13)
Clint leaves the area to discuss game 1. At this time he sees an attractive female parading around the hotel in as little as possible. Clint admits he would not mind hooking up with her seeing as she appears to be 15.
Game 2
Dark side vs Chris Bentley profit
Clint and Chris have a very non-interactive game. Clint gets all of his systems out very early. Clint takes the docking bay to fullfil BO. Clint drains and retrieves. Chris only drains. Clint wins.
4(+24)
Clint notices the attractive female again and becomes somewhat fond of her. She is definitely hot.
Game 3
Light side vs Guy with monkey ties
Clint is pissed because he cant find Orrimaarko. Clint finds order to engage and deploys the super falcon in front of a vanguard. Guy deploys lots of ties and battles. Clint senses 3 all powers and wins the battle. Clint gets spiral with Lando doing some stuff. Clint chases ties and drains. Guy gets emperor to docking bay. Mistake time. Clint drops guys and Orrimaarko and battles. Clint doesnt draw destiny. Guy is @#$%ed. Clint does this multiple times. Clint chases in space and eventually Clint wins.
6(+40ish?)
Clint sees the girlie again. Clint thinks shes hot as hell.
Game 4
Dark side vs Ben Terry tigih space.
Clint lets Luke move out to the Docking bay. 2nd turn Clint captures luke with Vader and moves to the ds:db. Clint puts more guys there. Ben gets ships to the death star but soon Clint has 3 ships at 3 systems and Clint is winning the drain race. Ben moves wedge and his ship to wakeelmui to slow Clint. Clint drops 4 ties and plays all power. Ben loses wedge and his ship and Clint plays Pride of the Empire. Clint then gets Ability x 3 out and the game proceeds rapidly. Clint wins thanks to the tie deck being so good.
8(+55ish?)
Game 5
Light side vs Chris Bentley TDIGWATT
Chris deploys Wakeelmui and DS:DB. Clint deploys Crix to Crix’s home. 2nd turn Clint signals for revolution and Clint revolves Wak. and a docking bay. Chris puts Zuckass to Bespin. Clint drops 2 ships and some guys and Zuckass dies. Clint revolves 2 more locations a turn later. Clint puts Obi and his gun with a couple guys to cloud city docking bay. Clint then revolves another location. Chris is getting 5 force thanks to Sec. Prec. Chris tries to circle obi but Clint wins a small SAC war. Clint brings big luke to the other cloud city site to battle Vader after Chris moves him away. Clint rids himself of Vader. Mara and ozzel try to hurt Clint but Clint rapes them. Chris lost because Clints deck raped Chris.
10(76)
Clint finds TJ and the two decide to go to get some food. As they walk through the lobby Clint sees the hot girlie. Clint says,"Hey!" The hot girlie turns around. Clint says,"How old are you?" The hot girlie stuns Clint when she says, "11." Clint can’t believe it. Girls are getting much better looking these days. Clint says she’s the hottest 11 year old he’s ever seen.
TJ and Clint go to wendys and make jokes about hooking up with 11 year old girlies at super 8 motels.
Game 6
Dark side vs Chris Prasnatchs ebo
Clint puts out ties. Chris puts out order to engage. Chris puts big ships in front of Clints ties. Clint cant battle. Clint cant cancel order to engage. Clint loses.
10(+70ish)
Clint takes 4th place and a sheet of uncut premeire uncommons for the light side.
After the tourney Clint and some other people there decide to go eat. Clint rides with TJ and Prasnatch to Vanderbilt to pick up their stuff. Clint and TJ run into Charlie Herren and he tags along. Clint directs them to Fat Mos and Clint orders the Super Deluxe after making jokes about Steven ordering a mini-mo combo. After this Clint says DQ is a must and it is. DQ is good but Q-Zar is better.
Clint, TJ, Prasnatch, Charlie Herren, Clay Raimey, and Scott Anderson head to play some laser tag. Scott gets lost and Clint says they will wait on him. After 15 minutes Clint decides enough is enough and the crew enters. There is a hot girlie working as a guide and Clint tries to flirt with her but it seems she has a boyfriend. In the briefing room Clint and friends await the beginning of the game. Just then Scott barges in. TJ says, "Hes a chode!" "He sucks COCK," says Clint. Laughter ensues. The teams are 6 Star Wars players against 2 old guys and 8 little kids. Scott then enters and says, "These guys drive like SHIT!" Clint cant control the laughter.
As the teams enter the ready room Clint asks the hot girlie guide to help him with his vest. Clint then asks for private lessons and she agrees to give Clint some pointers.
During the game Clint realizes that something is wrong. The other teams vests arent working. Clint shoots a little girl and she doesnt die. She shoots Clint back saying, "I got you!" Clint says,"Youre a F_A_G!". The girl says, "NO. You are." Clint got killed by a little girl and she called him a FAG. Clint is disgraced.
After the game Prasnatch chats with the workers there about Q-Zar. They exchange phone numbers and promise to call and talk about Q-Zar at least 3 times a week. What a bunch of @#$%s.
Clint decided afterwards that nothing else was worthy of going into the TR so the end has reached us.
Props and Slops
Props
-Prasnatch for playing well
-The girlie for being hot
-The guide girlie for being hot
-TJ for being cool
-Gabe for being the coolest guy Clint knows
Slops
-Nashville for letting an outsider win
-Clint for not adding Point Man
-Scott for not knowing how to drive
-The guide girlie for having a boyfriend(who was a @#$%got looking bastard)
-The girlie at the hotel for being 11(damn she looked good)
That’s all for now
Clint "GameMaster" Hays
Disclaimer: There were no cracks in this TR. Clint simply told you the cold, hard truth.