fitchburg-mass-the-ps2-is-mine

Title: fitchburg-mass-the-ps2-is-mine
Author: Andy "RexBanner7" Klema
Date: Mar 14, 2001

Where to begin? The whole idea of having a tourney with a Playstation 2 as the grand prize was somewhat old, Kris Earle (Red Squadron something or other, sorry about that) having come up with the idea. I was thinking of going immediately after I heard it announced over the Kashyyyk listserv, but I was trying to figure out where to stay and who would go with me.

After some persuasion and a lot of backhanding, my friend Cody “Legolas” DiCara got work off on Saturday so we could play in a tournament in Meriden to prepare for Sundays tourney in Fitchburg, Mass, where the PS2 would be up for grabs. Around this same time, I began talking to Mike “Deck” Gemme and Steve “Stevie B” Baroni about staying at Mike’s house before going to the tourney, since Mike was home from college on Spring Break. After Baroni told me that Mike had a hot @#$% sister, all was decided; me and Cody would attend the Meriden tourney, then drive up to Mike’s and spend the night playtesting and having sex with his sister.

About the day before, plans started to breakdown somewhat. Cody, who was driving both of us up, told me that he couldn’t go to Meriden because of some problems he was having with his parents. I told him it wasn’t that big of a deal, and we’d just go up to Mike’s a little earlier than we thought originally. So Cody leaves his house and comes to mine. I keep him there at least an hour and a half because I’m trying to finish burning a Rage Against the Machine mix CD, and it’s taking forever because my computer sucks. We finally leave my house at about quarter after 3, and make the drive up to Mike’s house in Worcester, Mass.

On the way up there, nothing amazingly exciting happened except for watching an undercover cop car flying by people in the far right hand lane going at least 90 mph. Other than that and listening to the RATM mix (which, as will be explained later, was key tech for the weekend), the right was uneventful, and we find Mike’s house at about quarter of 5.

So, we go into Mike’s house, and we get introduced to his mom, dad, kid brother Matt, and BAM!; his hot @#$% sister. And believe me, she was pretty fine, everything Baroni said she was. After finding out that she was having many other hot friends over, we secluded ourselves in Mike’s room like dorks and waited for Baroni while starting to playtest. Steve got there shortly after us, and we starting playing.

For LS I had my WYS deck which has done really well so far, but I wasn’t sure if it could stand up to HuntDown, so I was trying out a MWYHL high destiny mains deck. This was a pretty sweet deck....if the only thing you ever played against was HuntDown or Bring Him Before Me. But MKOS and Court absolutely killed it, and TIEs probably would have beat it too. So I switch it back to WYS because I knew the deck so much better, and it did well in playtesting so I didn’t care. For DS I was playing my undefeated MKOS (yeah, it doesn’t really matter if it’s undefeated, but I like saying that anyway) which I was sure I would play no matter what. It had some trouble against Baroni’s QMC deck because that’s a horrible matchup (Menace Fades hurts!), but it did fine against everything else. Cody played my MKOS and some @#$% HDWGITM? based on Cloud City. It was a good idea on paper, but it was @#$% when actually played. Baroni went with HuntDown 7’s (of course) and the QMC, and Gemme went with Skrilling MKOS and Hoth Clouds, which Baroni made and isn’t that bad.

In between doing a significant amount of testing, Gemme’s sister’s friends show up, and they’re all hot. They ask Baroni to take a picture of them, and from that comes the quote of the weekend; “We’re not sluts, we just dress like them.” Anyway, Baroni’s cover is blown when one chick asks him what grade he’s in, so he’s depressed for the rest of the night. Me and Cody don’t say much aside from random witty comments (well, me, not Cody because I’m the witty one - see D-Con report for more on that), and they leave us alone for the most part, and we do the same because we’d rather be quiet then be dorks and show them how to play Star Wars.

Around 11:30 pm, we go out to Denny’s for the Brownie. Now, let me tell you, everything I have read on the Brownie cannot even begin to describe it. You must experience the Brownie before you can understand it. I make the mistake of ordering some sampler piece of crap before ordering the Brownie (Gemme does the honors because we’re staying at his house), and thus have somewhat of a hard time choking the Brownie down. And Clint Hays (from which most of my Brownie knowledge comes from) is right; eating the Brownie is not a pleasurable experience. It is too rich, too dry, and too big all at the same time. I’m halfway through it, but I’m not really halfway through it because I was eating the smaller end. Anyway, I choke it down and finish first (without the aid of milk I might add) and laugh at Cody, Mike, and Steve because they’re having more trouble than me. Cody and Steve need milk to finish their’s, and Mike is eating around the whipped cream because the waitress ignored his request of nuts and no whipped cream by bringing him the exact opposite. But Mike thought he would get a little extra luck because the waitress brought him a free Brownie. This turned out to be untrue because when he woke up the next morning, he discovered that his sister and her friends secretly ate the Brownie in the night, cursing him for the next day. All this time, Baroni is trying ot eat some of Mike’s Brownie, and vice versa, while Cody is just getting more pale (if that’s possible :) ).

After the Denny’s experience, we all go back to Mike’s where we get some more testing in and then try to fall asleep. Then Gemme comes up with his mad Tzzvit tech (read his TR for more), and we all laugh, mocking him at the same time, though Baroni is totally into it. I fall asleep around 4-4:30 am, only after slapping Baroni across the face because he was snoring, and punching Cody in the shoulder for wanting to change his LS deck at 4 o’clock in the morning.

We wake up early the next day, get a game or two in, and then pack up and head out. Of course Fitchburg turns out to be a half an hour DUE NORTH of Worcester (which isn’t good for us CT people), so we will have to drive even further to get home. While getting lost in Fitchburg, Cody and I repeatedly play Know Your Enemy by RATM, which is easily the best song ever. This, combined with the RATM shirt under my hoodie, gave me mad tech for the day, even more so because I sang along.

We show up to the shop and there is a good amount of people, I think something like 30 in the end. As I’m scrambling to put together my decklist (and not get DQ’d), who shows up but the Terwilligers. Gemme knew that this would happen and didn’t tell us (the bastard!), so now the scene is Brian and Chris (both over 2000), Steve Brentson (2000+), Michael Schiemer (2040 something), Eric Hunter (don’t know, but high 1900s if not 2000), but no Hayes because he’s grounded or something. On to the first game.

Game 1: DS vs Jimmy Schiemer’s Throne Room Mains

I apologize to both Jimmy and Mike if I spelled their last name wrong, but that really can’t be avoided. Anyway, he starting Insurrection, Staging Areas, and Your Insight in response to my There Is No Try/Oppressive Enforcement, No Bargain, and Power of the Hutt (which I would start in every game). His first turn is absolutly rediculous because he throws down 4 Twixs, pull a docking bay, and put Melas there. Then he adds Goo Ne Tay! So this deck that I should always be able to beat is killing me to start. I start pulling stuff and tracking Jabba through my reserve deck. Of course that plan all goes to hell when I don’t find a site on the second turn and he gets to verify. So I just chuck down Jabba, Ephant Mon, and next turn Boelo, all with Scum on the table. He activates and draws for a turn or two, and then comes down with EPP Obi, who gets Barriered, and EPP Leia. He doesn’t battle, but he does put out Order to Engage. My turn I come down with EPP Fett, who gets Barriered which gets grabbed, and Dr. E. Here is where I lose the game. I initiate even though EPP Fett is Barriered, which cost me two destiny because of Jabba and the Jabba’s Through With You in my hand. I should have just Projectived the battle, Disarmed Obi next turn, and beat the hell out of him. But I’m an idiot. He swings and hits Jabba, shoots Dr. E, and plays Slight Weapon Malfunction to get a destiny, getting around Boelo. I draw destiny, and Obi dies, but I have to lose 3 characters. His next turn comes down with, I believe, another EPP Obi and EPP Han and EPP Luke, but doesn’t battle, probably because he didn’t want to lose a character to the Bacta Tank (which he had out) and then lose more next turn. On my turn I put down Guri, but battle anyway (second mistake). He again hits everyone, I don’t even hit Han (and I forget to play JTWY), and I lose everyone but Guri. On his turn he cancels Scum and the game was basically over. I get him down a lot of force because I beat on his Corran Horn for 12 cards, but after the first couple of turns, the game was pre-determined. FL by 5
0 (-5)

Highlights: Getting Scum out early. Nothing else.
Lowlights: MKOS lost! I can no longer say it’s undefeated! My stupid play on numerous occasions.

Not feeling too good after this game, but I remember that there probably won’t be any undefeateds, and a first round loss by that little might actually help me. I think it turns out that I was right.

Game 2: LS vs Greg Doyle’s Raltiir Ops

I remember Greg from CT States last year, and joke around a bit with him and his friend Ian. He’s got balls to play Raltiir, but I have no Oonee Ta to hit him with, so it could be a good game. I get a pretty decent draw, except that when I look for a docking bay with Insurrection, there isn’t one and he gets to verify. I return the favor a few turns later, so it’s not a big deal. He starts to set up, but only at one site, and with the Emperor at a 1/0 db. I put Super Falcon (Captain Han and Melas) up to the system, and fly to Raltiir since I have no Tatooine Celebration in hand. I then set up Jedi Luke and some smugglers at the docking bay. He responds with Vader, Tarkin, and Nemet in the Cantina, and Arica to block my drain. On my turn I try to SATM Arica, and draw duel ones, something that should never happen in my deck. It’s alright, because I play a Cantina Brawl and get Tarkin. Then I move over to Mos Eisley. He follows with Arica, and I place SATM out of play to miss her again. He does nothing special over the next turn except get in position to flip if he can get rid of the Falcon (he Lateral Damages it but doesn’t deploy ships). On my turn, I Cantina shuffle into the Cantina, drop some characters, and initiate against Vader and Nemet, but Clash Vader. Nemet gets hit up for something like 23 battle damage. That’s game (basically), and I set up Celebration for a turn or two just to get diff, but the game is over, and I’ve won. FW by 33
2(+28)

Highlights: Just about everything.
Lowlights: Beating Greg, because he really is good people. Missing Arica twice.

I’m feeling better, especially because I think LS is my weak deck, and it was good to win big with it. The next game is called out, and I get to play a game that I have wanted to for some time.

Game 3: LS vs Michael Hawley’s HuntDown

Michael (rayc on Decktech) and I have talked for some time, met each other, but never played each other. Both of us were happy for the opportunity. Unfortunately, this game was over with early. Michael deploys Janus to DS:DB (where I don’t go for fear of a Put All Section on Alert), and loses off the top to Visage because of a good hand. Lord Vader. I’m giddy. I activate, pull my DB, and see that I have Melas, Captain Han, and a OOC/TT all in my Force Pile. I draw up til I get them all, and play OOC. It’s Prepared Defenses or Vader and I get....Vader. Game. It’s a bad way to win, but it’s a win. I’m sorry it was to Michael though. The rest of the game is me setting up on Tatooine and the sites, retriving a little with Tatooine Celebration, and basically dominating since he couldn’t do much without Vader. I fail an On the Edge on Captain Han because I was just trying to retrieve, but that was after battling away the threat of Bossk and Zuckuss, so it didn’t matter. FW by 26
4(+54)

Highlights: The OOC. Setting up solidly.
Lowlights: Beating Michael. Winning a game (I feel) cheaply.

Feeling even better because LS won again. I know I’m going be start playing the 2000 players now though, and here we go.

Game 4: DS vs Michael Schiemer’s EBO Mains

This was a weird game, but also over pretty early since this is a great matchup for me. I start with Jabba in hand, and over the first turn or two, spread pretty thinly across Jabba’s Palace with a None Shall Pass for protection. Then I get Search and Destroy out, and he has to do something. He hadn’t been able to find his A New Secret Base (he started 3 effects), and he’s just been generating force with Crix at a docking bay. He gets out Oonee Ta and comes down with Tawss and Chewie, who gets None Shall Passed. Here he realizes his mistake and adds Melas, but it doesn’t do much good. Iggy gets added to Price Xizor, the Abyssin, and Dengar. We battle, and I miss Tawss (lucky for him), but hit both characters and play Jabba’s Through With You. I’m flipped and I get 3 destiny, so all of them are huge. He loses something like 19 cards from that battle, and that’s game. Search and Destroy plus my Galid drains are killing him, so the game is over, and by a lot as well. Never even got out Scum. FW by 34
6(+88)

Highlights: Dominating a good player. The big beatdown and good draw.
Lowlights: This was a bad matchup for Mike, and a new deck for him as well. I’d like to play another game with him that would turn out closer.

Well, Brentson just beat Brian Terwilliger (pretty sure that’s it), and I’m the highest 3-1, so guess who I’m playing?

Game 5: DS vs Steve Brentson’s Hidden Base Celebration

This is the bad matchup for my deck. Menace Fades kills Galid bonus, Battle Plan makes me pay for everything, and Celebration retrieves what little damage I do. I can’t rely on battle damage because of fear of Fallen Portals, so I decide that I have to take the system. My opening draw has Bossk, and I track Boba in Ship through the deck and set them both up on Tatooine around 3rd or 4th turn. I then set up the basic crew in the Audience Chamber with Scum out as well. Steve sets up some of his matching pilots at Rendezvous Point, and is apparently waiting for the right ships before he moves in after me. He also sets up Ben, Han, and Chewbacca, Protect at the docking bays and starts draining. At the system he has Mirax in ship, Dash in Ship, and a random Tala pilot. I initiate up there and begin the retrival. I lode up with fodder, and my 2 draws are huge because I’m flipped. He loses Mirax, the ship, and Dash. I lose fodder. He comes down next turn with Dash again (stupid Oonee Ta!) and we battle some more. This goes on for a while, with me running away after a long fight because my only ship left is Bossk. Meanwhile, Steve is slowly moving into the palace, mostly because a Sandwhirl is chasing him. I set up EPP Fett and Dr E in the chamber, so when he finally makes his way there, Ben is Disarmed and operated upon. I go for the big beats in the chamber, but he Narrow Escapes away. I move my characters around to wipe him out. He battles, and both sides are cleared, flipping my objective back. Around this time, I’ve drawn into Zuckuss, so I put him at Tatooine and move Bossk over to Tatooine, also flipping my objective by getting out Galid and spreading WAY out in Jabba’s Palace, comforted by my two None Shall Passes. We battle at the system, but I have Myos to cancel drains and use as forfeit fodder, and I’m retriving all the time, so I’m ahead. My Galid drains are starting to get to him, and even though he retrieves about 15 force with On the Edge (which I should have grabbed but was an idiot), the game is winding down. After a lot of battling, I take the system, and that’s basically game. FW by 29
8(+117)

Highlights: A great game with Steve. Winning one of my hardest matchups.
Lowlights: Almost losing because I lost Fett in Ship. Not grabbing On the Edge.

This has me pretty happy, not only because I have a realistic shot at the PS2, but because I determine whether or not I win it. I am far ahead on differential from anyone else, so if I win my next game, even by 1, I should win the whole thing. But the pairings are called, and I’m playing Brian Terwilliger.

Game 6: LS vs Brian Terwilliger’s MKOS Fortress

Much like my MKOS, Brian’s is the fortress version that is so close to old school ROps it isn’t funny. This deck is a beast, but it disadvantaged against my WYS, which is one of the reason I play it. My deck does to Brian’s what Brentson’s should have done to mine. I set up the Super Falcon at the system early, and I get Jedi Luke with saber, + crew out quickly as well. Tatooine Celebration as well as Battle Plan come up, and the game is going decidely my way. I’m doing a good amount of damage, and retrieving much of what he is throwing at me. He has the Sail Barge with Dengar, Xizor and others sitting at Mos Eisly, and I want to Shuffle, Sorry About the Mess, and Clash to win in one big battle (as I often do), but I’m afraid of Disarmed, so I wait until I have ECC Lando in hand before I do anything. He sees taking the system as his only chance of winning the game, so he loads Zuckuss and the Stinger (with Guri inside-curses!) with tons of fodder, and then fun begins. I play this as smart as I can, and when he battles, I play Punch It! to make the Falcon immune. I lose Dash to the Bacta Tank and the Outrider to the docking bay (I’ll Take the Leader) to cover everything. I set right back up next turn, and then same thing basically happens, with me playing Punch It! from the lost pile, and more of his fodder dying. Around this time, I make my move with the Shuffle. There is no SATM in my lost pile anymore, so I Disarm Dengar and Clash Xizor. He barriers both my characters that I try to throw down, so he doesn’t lose that much force. Xizor stays Clashed, but when he becomes unClashed, Brian leaves him there, backing him up a little. I take full advantage of this mistake, and Clash Xizor from the lost pile, and beat up Dengar and Myo for 19 battle damage. This is basically game, as it leaves Brian with hardly any cards to draw for destiny at the system, so there is no way he can wipe me out. The game ends with my retriving with Celebration, and draining him out. FW by 31
10(+148)

Highlights: Another excellent game. Beating one of the best players in the world.
Lowlights: Brian forgetting to move Xizor. Almost losing the system.

So, I win the tourney and get the Playstation 2! Mint! I get many congrats from everyone there, and I’m a happy man. Hayes shows up late to find out what happened, and is surprised as hell that I won, so it’s all good. :) Me and Cody leave after thanking everyone, and we make the 2 1/2 hour ride home in about 1 3/4 hours. Speeding is fun. And of course, in tribute to the mad tech that made the weekend, we play RATM and Know Your Enemy all the way back. Throw in some Bad Religion, and it was a sweet @#$% car ride. Now, for the time honored tradition of props and slops:

Props:
Mike Gemme for letting us stay at his house, for having a hot sister, for having the balls to play Hoth Clouds, and just being the man. You better come down to Terryville.
Steve Baroni for being just as cool, and for doing well, despite Gemme eating your brownie.
Cody for playing a @#$% light side and not caring (that much), and for the ride of course.
Justin Desai for being cool as always, despite scrubbing out. :)
Eric Hunter for being there and doing good, even though I didn’t get to play him.
Michael Hawley for being one of the coolest guys I know that plays this game, and for finally playing each other. I had a blast.
The Terwilligers for making the trip, for being cool, for beating the crap out of Cody and Baroni in the Snow Ball Wars, and for being great opponents. It was awesome having you guys down there.
Kris Earle for running a tremendous tourney with no mistakes whatsoever. It was very nicely done, thanks a lot Kris.
Jimmy Schiemer, for beating my MKOS (even with a god draw) and being cool.
Ditto for Mike Schiemer, except for the beating me part. :)
Gemme’s sister for having hot friends over. Hey Mike, ask her if she’s still sore. :)
The Brownie and RATM for bringing me luck, even if it came at a price.
I think that’s about it, but don’t be insulted if I forgot you. A lot happened, and a lots a blur.

Slops:
Eric Hunter for dancing.
Hayes Hunter for not going. Jerk. :)
Wendy’s for putting mayo on burgers. WTF?
The Brownie for tasting so bad.
I think that’s about it.

It’s been real all, and that PS2 sure looks nice. I hope to see as many people as possible in Terryville, cuz it’s gonna be a blast. Later all, and good day.