geoff-doesnt-play-at-normal
Title: geoff-doesnt-play-at-normal
Author: Geoff "gsiva" Snider
Date: Jun 30, 2001
okay it’s saturday and i’m running a tournament today and i am NEVER playing in a local tournament here again because everyone b1tches and moans about having to play me ’cause they get smacked around so bad. the ONLY bonus to this is that i can pretty much play any deck i could ever want to have fun with because they just can’t seem to beat even the out of date stuff. so enough of my run-on sentence. I’m just going to run there here from now on, unless there’s some huge resurgence of good players (like when he11 freezes over). Twelve thirty rolls around and we still only have six people. One of them (Fairbanks) says "Hey! Let’s go get Tyler and wake him up," so they drive off to get him...and we wait. AND WAIT. And wait some more. They return about forty-five minutes later with a barely awake Tyler Nafziger after making a very long trip around town to pick up Fairbanks’ decks.
We finally get an eigth man when Justin Stanley shows up out of the blue. He’s returned from Cali for a week to visit the fam. Matt Hempstead is another player to show his head for the first time in about three years. whoa.
Final lineup for the event:
Mike Kalmbach: RalOps/ProfitRacing
Tyler Nafziger: BHBMmains/HolotableRacing
Matt Hempstead: TDIGWATToldschool/TIGIH
Brad Augsburger: WYSbeatdown/HDADTJracing
James Paluska: COTVG/EBOracing
Keith Brown: COTVGracing/RST
Justin Stanley: HDADTJ/TatMains
David Fairbanks: HayesPile/AOTBS
First of all I’d like to say that I don’t think I’ve ever seen a larger bunch of nitwits playing in a tournament before. Every time I turned around I saw some of the most idiotic plays I’ve EVER seen. Here they are:
HayesPile vs. RalOps:
I see a bunch of atst’s on Ralltir opposite Jedi Luke and Qui-gon...and I see the guy putting Sense in his used pile with 3P0! WTF is that? The RalOps player is NOT reducing the drain of 3 from Obi-Wanw/stick at a revolved Obi-Wan’s Hut. To top it off, I see the Pile player initiate battle against Mara w/stick, 2 atst’s and 2 random pilots...and here’s the kicker: THE ATST’s REACT AWAY FROM THE BATTLE!!! I laugh my a$$ off at this one and tell them AFTER the game about that whole "react" thing. heh.
WYSbeats vs. COTVG:
Epp Han somehow stumbles into the Audience chamber despite the Un-Choked presence of the Ephont Mon. Unfortunately this is the lead in for the entire "Run Luke Run! + Bad Feeling" combo that causes around 75 battle damage. Poor James never saw it coming, but at least he had a chance with Hidden Weapons (unfortunately drawing a 1). CHEATIN’ I SAY! PURE CHEATIN’!!!
Huntdown Podracing vs. RST:
Vader is sitting at the Back Door with BOTH OF HIS LIGHTSABERS!! WHOA! Jedi Luke and Corporal Midge move over from the Landing Site. Vader uses Sniper and misses JLuke. Vader (DLOTS) initiates against JLuke, plays IHYNow, JLuke cuts Vader, Vader Epic Duels JLuke (playing both Focused Attack AND throwing the lightsaber to the used pile after using Dark Path) and wins...and LUKE IS RESILLIENT! (cancelling the duel). IHYNow is totally forgotten about at this point, and Brad opts to lose Vader and four instead of choking midge and drawing 15 in destiny. WHOOPS! He somehow pulls out the win.
And here’s the kicker:
WYSbeats vs. AOTBS:
It’s late game and both players have been dukin’ it out at the Spaceport DB. Guri is sitting in front of ECC Chewie, ECC Lando and Melas. 4lom w/gun is sitting in front of Epp Luke. Artoo & Threepio are deployed in front of Guri, Luke fights 4lom, cuts him and draws a 5 for destiny...and the LS player says "you take 0 battle damage ’cause you had 0 ability." The LS player then initiates battle against Guri, drawing a 1 for destiny. He says "that’s Guri or 6 cards!" and I’m just standing there trying to keep my mouth shut. The DS player loses six cards and keeps Guri there! WHAT THE HE11 IS THAT!! Not only did he lose six, but after one player reminded the other that there was 0 battle damage, they continued to both forget about it. MORONS! I’M SURROUNDED BY MORONS!
Okay, so Matt Hempstead takes first with TIGIH and TDIGWATT. Only 1 person ran DDTAgain, so docking bay force generation ran rampant. I laughed alot. I cannot believe that we only got eight people...simply because the krazy komar klan usually shows up for this sort of shindig. Oh well. Each round of the tourney I went around with two stacks of rares from my stuff and everyone got one at random...I think the best card pulled was...BB Death Star or something like that.
Prizes were Foil EPP ObiWan, Foil EPP Fett and 2x Foild Masterful Move.
Heh...what a silly tournament. I got a chance to finish reading my book...and had a few laughs in the process. See you all at Origins!