15-6-2001-melbourne-qualifier-thing
Title: 15-6-2001-melbourne-qualifier-thing
Author: Haakon ".prototype." Geburtstag
Date: Jul 16, 2001
so, yeah, we all rock up at 9 o clock as usual and kevin is late as ever. ronnie wilcox comes along after a hard night at the pipe, but he doesnt look REALLY ripped so its okay. luca and adam turn up later as well, and adam’s g/f is playing? wtf? thats pretty impressive, adam. this being my first tournament of the year, AND without any decent tatooine mains, i’m looking to get owned by the surrounding wildlife. i bring along:
Dark: HDADTJ podracing cheese
Light: dodgy @#$% QMC crap
these decks were built in the wee hours of the morning after i decide last minute to come along to this continental qualifier thing. so yeah, i think it doesnt look good...but i am proved wrong, cause people in my region are a55. observe:
(ps, there were too many new faces for me to remember everyones names, send em and i might change em...might...and oh, i forget all my specific differentials...sorry)
1st game: my LS vs random person #1’s RalOps.
now this is a surprise. i chat to random person #1 and it appears he has been out of the game for a while too. phew, good starting game. however, i appear to have been awake for more of the year than he was. i set up qmc like normal, he sets up his ralops shiznit, we dont interfere with each other...however, he soon spies a lone tawss khaa at the lower corridor...HELLO says darth maul, ready to pull down his pants and bend tawss over...but then, adjacent site, EP Luke, Run Luke Run, cut maul, destiny 5, his destiny 1, nuff zed. having been trashed on the ground, he tries to whip out vaders and maras schlong on raltiir (how does mara have a schlong? dont ask), but then Menace Fades kicks in cause, well, wedge and his ship were needed to flip. so. he deploys one of those special ed cloud TIEs to control CC sector, which is a drain of 2..OUCH..wedge tries to stop him, but he pulls out LONE PILOT! what player uses jank like lone pilot??? anyway, he pulls destiny 3 and 4, i pull 5...bye TIE and bye Wedge (red squaddie 1 still floating). i off the edge to get wedge back, cause wedge always wins. during his turn, i send outrider and dash to bespin to keep Menace going...menace stopping his bonuses, and battleplan making him pay...so he sends a couple of BH ships (bossk and Zimh if i remember correctly) to try and rape outrider, but he cant cause i barrier bossk. so next turn, i play wedge back to his ship, and play corran on board outrider. also pull Ill take hte Leader. he initiates battle? silly. i cancel his destiny, and immune to his destinies of 1..and 1. +3 for ralltiir? who cares. anyway, i outdrain and he dies...
FW +21
next game...james ward. this guy always has strong decks, and i always get put off my game :P
DS vs james ward QMC
well, i see qmc and think ’oh no, raping time.’ but my DS has lots of tricks up its a55 and if james dares stick quigon’s d1ck up there, then he’ll be in for a surprise. he has no podracer to challenge sebulba, so i know that the podrace is mine. he puts down quigon and tawss to CC sites and drains a bit...i put emperor to the Arena, waiting...biding time. he puts Corran to holotheatre, canceling visage! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ahhh but then he sees CHYBC and he elis corran to CC (phew). so, i send a suicide vader with stick to CC vs quigon and tawss, try to slash quigon, miss...his destiny is phat, mine is not. vader covers the deficit. okay, not good. we lose to visage. then...i win the podrace! 11 force and he has no aim high. whahahahahah what a raping. he loses all sorts of good stuff, so i put true vader to the arena, and the dark side posse of vader, janus and the emperor drain for 3 each turn. okay. he sees my drain is phat, so he spreads out to counter. fatal mistake. i play Mara with a disruptor pistol to Chewie with Blaster and a random Endor scout dude. i vaporize chewie with my mad destiny draw, and i pull a 5 for battle destiny. so my 11 beats his...2. loses the scout for 3 or something. from there on, it was a mop up, i think he elised quigon to the arena and wanted a fight, but he died before that happened i think.
FW +19
erm..my memory gets a bit hazy from here on...bear with me. and dont smoke dope, it makes you stupid.
DS vs Luca costanzo WYS.
now THIS was tight. i confessed to luca that i was playing podracing cheese, and he forgave me, so that was cool of him. i dont remember much of this game save the pivotal moments: namely, me winning the podrace. 11 force. good. next pivotal moment...okay, he has mirax and a freighter captain (i think) at the docking bay, i have suicide vader with stick ready to smack, he barriers, i curse. during his turn, he plays luke, I have a bad feeling (x3 damage), runs luke run over and we fight. now, i have Vaders Obsession in hand. i play it, and we duel. i pull 6 and 5, not bad for blind dueling. he, however, plays Jedi Resilience from lost pile. HOLY CRAP. i cut luke, but he has destiny 9 or something dodgy and i have a 1. bye vader, and 15 force. ball crunching action there...very tense, but we played like psychos. from there on, he drained at kessel, i drained at the cantina with the emperor...he wins by 5 force. VERY tight game. best game all day.
FL -6
well, losing to luca, the resident @#$% kicker, that means i was DESTINED to play adam amy. of course, it makes so much sense. i LOSE therefore i play the BEST PLAYER. what logic, kevin.
LS vs Adam Amy SYCFA big blue
this was a total rort. he pulls all this merrejek/system/executor/fondor shiznit from his deck and controls Bespin with grand admiral thrawn. well, goodbye flip. i try the outrider with powerpivot, but no go. everyone died. then he does some really tricky stuff with Blacksun Fleet/Bossk/ZiMH to get a cantina shuffle in space for some fuct drain of 6 each turn, while he plays Death Squad destroyers at Bespin, who then follow Bossk...covering double space in half the time, total tech. and to top it off, adams girlfriend mentioned giving him a blowjob during my move, which put me off COMPLETELY for a loss of 25 or something. goddamn it.
FL -25 odd
well, that killed my differential. ouch. fortunately, my next game is against a scrub.
LS vs random person #2 weird alien/S&V/musician stuff
i saw his opening and correctly picked this guy for a scrub. however, i made so many bad plays it wasnt worth chalking down. he stacks up full on like 15 musicians at the audience chamber, while i set up my merry little colony with a LONE WEDGE AT THE BESPIN SYSTEM. i celebrate, and he comes down with some guys like an IG88, Xisor and a foil 4-LOM (without stick). i do mean and nasty things to them with my EP’s, but he ghhks away the damage. damn. he plays more musicians to retrieve those dodgy guys, THEN elis helrots all his musicians to CC. AAAAARGHHHH they’re like obiwan+sebulba+shmi+darthvader+jarjar or something. fortunately he sucked so bad that he didnt split them up, and i dodged and pathed to avoid his crap, however, he kept retrieving. finally, i play obi wan to the audience chamber and cancel scum, giving me a chance. we have one battle which cleans me out almost, but...i play path, retrieve from celebration, path, retrieve, path, you get the picture...until i outdrain him. it was a sad day for star wars ccg.
FW +7 (cause i forgot to shuffle back my battle destiny :P )
and the final matchup? another scrub who likes mommas.
DS vs random person #3’s Hidden Base.
the first person all day to challenge my podracing with Anakin. i actually had to use those interrupts that id thrown in which didnt do anything cause no one played anakins pod, which was good...this guy tells me i can only use sebulbas flame bursters like, once per RACE...i say its if you have same number race total, he says no, but i still beat him. 11 force, ouch. now, he plays a spy and obi to holotheatre, so i follow up with suicide slash vader, who cuts obi wan (no duel sorry :P ) and makes the other guy die...vader also goes, bye bye vader. he drains me at kessel, i drain at arena. then i play vader to arena, and another visage of emperor. mwahahhaha. he is hurting badly. i also play mara with disruptor pistol to holotheatre to prevent bad spy stuff. he loses all his mains off the top to the podrace. miraculously, i win.
FW +19
well thats that. ronnie wilcox, despite getting wasted the previous night and getting one hours sleep walks away with the bye for the continentals. theres hope for me yet. not sure of the complete ranking, but if luca or ronnie do a TR then it’ll be in theirs...i come 5th or something, and get a quigon in a pack of tatooine to replace the one i traded for a foil trample and ORS. so yeah, that was good fun, i might go to continentals, but theres all that legal paperwork shiznit. and restrictions on conduct. how dodgy. anyway, thanks for reading, everyone. stay sober.
kiss kiss,
giles.
props:
kev for hosting
ronnie for kicking the most @#$% with his dodgy bhbm deck.
ronnie for offering me a maul for quigon. ill take u up on that.
luca for the best game of the day. that was tight, my friend.
adams girlfriend, for being a chick, and playing starwars; that takes some real balls. (no pun intended)
kev for giving me a quigon.
TOOL for having a concert in exactly a WEEK!!!! HOORAY!!!
the dude who traded me a CC celebration before the tourney: phew!
slops:
adam for raping me like the man @#$% i am.
kev for starting late...buy a REAL car!
those 2 little kids for stealiing my fear factory beanie and my folders. that chair is goin for your head, kids.
TOOL for making their concert 72 bucks, and giving me crappy seats, and for only doing 1 show..oh, i cant stay angry at you.
tatooine mains for being so expensive.
dope for being so expensive.