furry-and-furious-at-the-atlanta-dpc
Title: furry-and-furious-at-the-atlanta-dpc
Author: Matt "Furry Fury" Mathison
Date: Aug 9, 2001
Traveling with me to Atlanta is Sander Hartlage, Chris Work and Matt Alford. Matt doesn’t play but is still cool because he uses the word "boobies" more than any other person in the universe. We leave at 11 PM because Matt has to work late. We stay in a Microtel in Birmingham that night and head into Atlanta early Friday morning. My buddy John Camp was getting married the week after the tournament and we decided to combine his bachelor party with the DPC. He decides to meet us in Atlanta at this big water park that is slightly north of the city. Also, meeting us at the water park was Ravi Pentapaty our host while in Atlanta. The water park was powerfully crowded. Unfortunately, out of the 4647879465 people there only two of them were girls within three years of my age. There were many high quality MILFs in attendance though so it was all good. We leave after Sander threatens to destroy the world by going down the 90 ft. straight down slide which should be called The Colonic. If you don’t know Sander he is a very, very big fellow.
We follow Ravi back to his place which unfortunately looks like a giant crack house. Upon questioning the reason he gives for living in such a run down dwelling is that he is really, really cheap. We drink a little mainly to relieve or fear of the Jawa sized roaches wondering the halls and go to sleep at a fairly decent hour. I wake up during the night and see a dark shadow towering over me. I prepare myself to fight to the death against the Crazed Crack head/Mutant Roach/Vampire that is about to get me when I notice it is Chris Work. I look at him for a second and then ask what is wrong and he replies that he just wants to know what time it is. I walk over to the table where I left my watch and see John and Sander dangerously close to being cuddled up next to each other. Ravi’s crack house was very cold but that is still no reason for that kind of behavior. I wake up first in the morning and go to use the super nasty communal shower. I carefully avoid the part of the bathroom, which is rumored to be the domain of a Diagona. An hour later we are all ready and head out to Denny’s for a piece of the legendary tech the Brownie. Once we get there we discover that the Brownie no longer exists and settle for a piece of chocolate pie. I don’t think it worked.
We get there a half hour early and talk to some guys from Nashville and Huntsville. The room that the tournament is being held in is incredibly big. The 60 Star Wars players only take up a third of the available room. Pairings are called and I get matched against Tim Jones who was a fairly nice guy.
Game One
My Walkers vs. Tim Jone’s (1630) Tat. Liberation Mains
I start my usual and Tim starts the system and the farm and three effects including the Insurrection and such. We both begin to set up I start with the third marker in my hand. My activation is quick as usual and I establish a quick and painful drain at the third marker. Tim quickly rallies Lando with Vibro, Qui Gon and Ben. They drain for a while and eventually DB transit them to Hoth where my Walkers drain and damage coupled with my Imperial Decree lock were quickly depleting his life force. He chases my walkers around but I am able to keep hitting him with direct damage and keep Imperial Decree in effect. Eventually, he deploys Padme and threepio for forfeit and spreads to force me to fight him. His newly weakened forces are now vulnerable to attack and Vader with saber makes use of the darkside third marker text to carve Ben up. In the ensuing attacks my walkers immunity generally hold up to his battle destinies and I drain and damage him to death.
FW 10
2(+10)
Highs: Winning my first game.
Lows: My deck didn’t perform all that well.
My next opponent is Jeremy Sumrall who happens to be from Louisiana. I believe he was a sophomore at LSU but my memory is not the greatest. He was really cool but we didn’t have to long to talk before the game started.
Game Two
My Blow the Bunker vs. Jeremy Sumrall’s(1731) Walkers
He is playing a walker deck similar to my on and I think I know how to beat it. He uses his first turn to set up his activation and draws. I deploy Crix, Chewbacca, and Wuta. Jeremy deploys Lord Vader and his Saber and battles slashing Crix. I play Rebel Leadership and draw two blind sixes causing him to lose Vader and six more. I reinforce the site but he continues to assault me for the next few turns. Eventually, he lets me have the Rebel Landing Site and concentrates on causing damage on Hoth. He deploys presence on the 5th marker and expand the empire on the third marker. I have Honor out on the table and I know that I can minimize his damage if I can keep him off a third battleground. I resolve to use the Clash of Saber in my hand to cancel the presence if he ever deploys there. Unfortunately, in one of the most brainless move of the whole DPC I lose it to a force drain. He uses walker garrison twice to drain for twelve, which quickly destroys my life force. I blow the bunker without any trouble and his lack of Secret Plans allows me to out last him and win the game by a stupidly low margin.
FW 4
4(+14)
Highs: Random pair of sixes that allowed Crix, Wuta and Chewie to mess up Vader.
Lows: Stupidly losing the Clash.
Mark Fessler is my next match up. He was using decks his friend built and kept consulting his friend about what certain cards did during our game. I didn’t mind but it was still pretty funny.
Game Three
My Blow the Bunker vs. Mark Fessler’s (1462) SYCFA Flip
I get a really good start this game and put down Chief Chripa’s Hut and the Dense Forest from hand. I forgo the Wuta/Chewie start and instead opt for Gen. Han, Crix and Kensaric. Mark gets the Superlaser on the Death Star and moves it to parsec one. I gather the stuff I need to crack the bunker. He takes my puny drains on Endor and finally gets to Alderan. His next turn he ponders whether or not to try to blow Alderan as he doesn’t have enough gunners to make it guaranteed. I’m hoping he doesn’t as I have enough guys in my hand to totally wipe out his guys the following turn. He decides against it. I blow the Bunker and make him put down his hand so there is nothing he can do about my coming beat down. My strike force of Jar Jar, Obi and a scrub scout wipe out his gunners. He can do very little at this point and the only force he makes me loose is from his drain at the Endor system. I drain him out quickly and get my only decent sized win of the tournament.
FW 30
6(+44)
Highs: Actually winning with a decent margin. My deck performing well.
Lows: Mark didn’t get to blow Alderan which was kinda sad.
I get matched up against Clay Wilburn and know him to be a good player because I met him a week or two earlier in Huntsville. We talk for a while about our performances in the tournament so far and crap like that before the game begins.
Game Four
My Walkers vs. Clay Wilburn’s (1875) WYS
Clay is playing podracing and he gets a really good start on Tatooine including Capt. Han in the Falcon to Tat. I deploy the Executor to Fondor and get some damage happening on Hoth with a walker and pilot to the third marker. Clay solidifies the Cantina and gets celebration going in space with Wedge in the Pulsar Skate and Dash in the Outrider. I am really hurting as Clay is retrieving most of the damage I am doing to him and hitting me with a stiff Cantina drain. My Vader/Tarkin combo supported by a walker takes his DB and forcing him to move over from the Cantina. He wins the podrace and things begin to look bad but I have some lucky draws on Tatooine and some of his draws turn out bad. He eventually separates his space force and I am able to cancel Tatooine celebration with the help of a fortuitous Lateral Damage. In the late game I used his Draw their Fire to retrieve some, as well as, do damage to him. I drain him out after clearing most of his characters from the table.
FW 12
8(+56)
Highs: Im in fourth place at this point.
Lows: Clay is cool and it sucks having to beat him.
4-0 is damn good for me and lands me really close to the top table. I am paired against Andy McClure who I had met and played against in Huntsville earlier. He is really cool but unfortunately much better than me.
Game Five
My Walkers vs. Andy McClure’s(1989) WYS
He is playing a WYS that starts three effects. Early on he uses insurrection to pull the non-unique DB and deploys a Raider in Craft there to flip WYS. I think I see an opening and use the twilek in my hand to get No Escape and drop several Imperials including Vader on his lone Smuggler. Unfortunately, when I initiate the battle he uses Out of Somewhere to react with Talon Karde. His destinies and forfeit keep him safe and my remaining characters begin to march toward the Cantina to drain. Andy is a great player and is not the least daunted by my early assault. He immediately begins to regroup. I do a good bit of damage to him through drains and battles. The turning point of the game happens when Andy On the Edges three times in the same turn for five apiece. At this point I decide that in all future games I will start Secret Plans instead of Mob. Points when playing WYS. We battle back and forth and his high, multiple destinies wreck my ground forces. I could of easily taken him out of space but none of my four imperial commands are anywhere to be found. He eventually drains me out after completely clearing me from Tatooine.
FL 27
8(+29)
Highs: No Escape beatdown was cool.
Lows: No Escape beatdown didn’t work.
My first loss has sent me to the very end of the top table. I look at my command card and see that they have me scheduled to play dark for the third time in a row. I complain and set in motion a series of repairing which delays the tournament ten or fifteen minutes during which time I am paired with three different people. I finally settle in front of Jody Rodd an Atlanta native who is once again really cool.
Game Six
My Blow the Bunker vs. Jody Rodd (1861) SYCFA Brangus
I deploy to the RLS quickly with Madine, Kensaric and Wuta. Jody deploys Vader with saber on his turn and I barrier him. My turn I deploy another couple characters and attack Vader. I am unable to do much damage and two of my characters go to my lost pile. On his turn Jody gets out Brangus and uses his docking bay switching capability to bring back Vader and assaults me again this time with both Vader and Maul. I lose more characters. I have lost a great deal of my characters and now have no one with four ability to oppose Maul so I regroup and draw some cards. Jodi uses Mauls ability reducing power to deploy the Emperor to my site and then abuses Force Lightning/Brangus to kill some of my characters. I move over to the Bunker to see if I can get something happening. About this time he wins the podrace and his life force grows significantly while mine shrinks by a lot. Eventually, Jody moves Maul over to the bunker to keep me from blowing it. Somehow despite my heavily depleted life force I get Jedi Luke and Anakin’s saber out to smack Maul around for a fifteen-force loss. After that I fizzle out and he outdrains me to win by a large margin.
FL 24
8(+5)
Highs: Seeing the Brangus Deck in action for the first time.
Lows: The 22 force swing I couldnt do anything about.
Chris Work is very powerful. He is the first person I ever saw beat my old school nemesis Chris Riccardi. Chris Work was bouncing around the 1600s back before I even had a rating. He is a really good player but sometimes his deck choices are a little cheesy.
Game Seven
My Walkers vs. Chris Work(1638) WYS Racing
My deck starts of quickly as usual although this was the only game of the tournament where I didnt start with the third marker in hand. Chris deploys a guy to a Tatooine site and put Captain Han at the system to flip. I come at him hard with Bossk in HT and the Chimaera but he uses Hyper Escape to flee to the DB. I set up some of my guys draining and damaging on Hoth but Chris’ deck retrieves a lot of force. He begins draining me in the cantina with two Smugglers and I am forced to use Vader to get rid of them. At one point he attempt to edge for five but does not have enough force to pay for the retrieval with Secret Plans out. We battle back and forth and eventually I control Hoth while he holds dominion over Tatooine. He isn’t doing as much damage as I am but his celebration is giving him the edge. Thrawn in the Executor move over to confront Captain Han and Chewie in the Falcon. We battle but an Imperial Command gives me the advantage. I am able to kill the celebration and barely edge Chris out in a really close game.
FW 4
10(+9)
Highs: Meeting my 5-3 goal
Lows: Having to play Chris Work
A really want to win this game. I know there is no chance that I can get into the final four but it would be really cool to go 6-2. I am really tired at this point and am ready to get on to the post tournament activities, which consist of strippers and drinking.
Game Eight
Blow the Bunker vs. Ken Brune’s(1741) Dark Deal
I know this is going to be a really tough match up for my deck and am unsure what to start. I eventually settle on Shield is Down, Squadron Assignments and Strike Planning. First turn I begin to establish things on Endor and look for a way to get Menace out on the table. Things did not go well for me and I was not able to get any of my really good characters or Menace before he sets up the Dark Deal. I attack his forces to early and cannot do any real damage and have some of my character captured. I eventually take Cloud City from him but never come close to being to cancel the deal due to the presence of Aqualishes on CC. Once the drains of ten begin I know its mostly over and make a last ditch attempt to blow the bunker. I fail when he Elises his characters to the Bunker. It was probably for the best though as he had out secret plans, which would have, prevented my retrieval and probably had more than eight cards in hand.
FL 15
10(-6)
Highs: Absolutely nothing
Lows: Realizing how bad my deck is.
I am annoyed at losing the last game but glad the tournament is finally over. Clint dominates and goes 8-0. He eventually wins the tournament if you somehow missed it. We go and eat then rush home to meet Matt Alford and Ravi. We sally forth from Ravi’s crack house towards the strip club. Atlanta has been in the news a lot lately for strippers sleeping with athletes so all the clubs have gotten a lot tighter with there policies. No lap dances for instance although they are still allowed to get totally nude which is cool. Our showclub of choice is Boomers which is the only one we could find that would allow in 18 year olds. Unfortunately the sacrifice for this is no alcohol. A lot of the strippers are really hot. One in particular got my attention. There are two important qualities in a stripper; wigglely and gigglely. This chick had both of them in vast quantities. I was going to go and stick some $1 in her garter but this dude who looked strangely like Clint Hays had her complete attention. He would stand next to the stage and toss out a $1 every 10 seconds. It was bizarre. He had a weird blank look in his eyes and would only show any emotion when she bent over to pick up his giant pile of dollars. About this time I noticed that Sanders pants had a large amounts of weird stains that were only visible under black lights. I accused him of spuging all over the place every time he saw a stripper. After repeated questioning he eventually admitted it was true. We head out of the strip club around three and go back to Ravi’s to drink large amounts. Somehow I end up wondering over to the Cartoon Network HQ and consider waiting there until people show up so that I can demand they show Transformers. Waiting is something drunken people are not good at and we eventually go back and get to sleep at five in the morning.
The reason this TR is so late is because I worked all last week and then had to go to John’s wedding on the next weekend. The wedding was really fun but the whole time I kept expecting John to make a break for the woods. Chris Work almost scored but was thwarted by various unfortunate circumstances. John had at least 8 friends at the wedding that played Star Wars so we were going to have a sanctioned tournament, which was going to be called JohnCon. Surprisingly, it fell through and instead we played Basket Ball and went Swimming.
Props:
John Camp for turning into a grown up instead of the psycho we all thought he would eventually be and going 5-3
Chris Work for almost scoring and kicking serious @#$% at the DPC (5-3)
Sander for not destroying the earth and being really funny
Matt Alford for saying "boobies"
Ravi Pentapatty for putting us up for the weekend and being generally cool
Clint Hays for winning and for coming back to UT next year
Andy McClure for enjoying my use of the word "Powerful" and for being a cool
opponent
Clay Wilburn for being worried about bumping his head on Vanderbilt ceilings
Water park slides and MILFs
Matt Crigger because his name is Matt
Ravi’s roach fighting stick which was our only defense against the mutant swarms
Most Powerful Props
Stripper with the wigglely gigglely
Slops
John for not making a break for the woods
My @#$%ty @#$% decks
Not being able to drink in a strip club
Jamal Lewis for hurting himself before the season starts
Giant Mutant Roaches