freedomcon-you-cant-handle-the-tooth
Title: freedomcon-you-cant-handle-the-tooth
Author: Justin "hoostino" Warren
Date: Nov 28, 2001
Virginia Beach, Virginia
For those of you that can’t figure it out, the title is a distortion of a Jack Nicholson line. :)
In 2001, I owned Texas. My combined tournament record was 45-5, and I won the State Championships. It has been by far my best year since starting the game in 1997. But, I had never played a sanctioned game outside of the Dantooine region. And I hadn’t really played any players from outside the state because I’m a sheltered bastard. Anyway, throughout the year, I began to think I was getting pretty good, and I was adamant about attending Worlds, not only to play but to meet many of the cool people I’ve met on DeckTech and what not. One of my best friends and probably the most well-known player from Texas, Matt Lush, also expressed a huge deal of interest in attending Worlds. Thus, we both bought tickets sometime in August. Then, the unthinkable happened.
Decipher canceled DecipherCon and the World Championships. I was initially in a state of disarray, disappointed and angry that I now was unable to experience what so many others have described as the ultimate SWCCG experience. Decipher had taken away my first opportunity to attend Worlds. But, Mr. David Akers and a plethora DeckTech supporters came through and FreedomCon emerged. My hopes regained life, and my plans continued. But there would be a roadblock in Matt’s path. A road-block known as the U.S. Army. I hate to criticize the military in these times, but I’ve lived in a military community for the majority of my life, and I must say that I have observed that the Army can be incompetent, unreasonable, and far too narrow-sighted at times. It’s almost daily that I hear stories of military idiocy from Army friends. But I guess the military’s lack of efficiency isn’t to blame for Matt not going to FreedomCon, just a horrible coincidence that forced Matt to leave for a month-long training session in California right in the middle of FreedomCon. So, he couldn’t go. But no coincidence kept another best friend from attending--Jeremy Losee. He couldn’t go because the Army refuses to allow vacation time until Christmas thanks to those damn dirty terrorists. A several-day trip isn’t unreasonable by any means for Army personnel, even in current circumstances because they’re still just going to work like normal for the most part. But whatever. Bottom line is: it sucks to be in the Army (but it’s sometimes cool for guys like me when military housewives get lonely while their husbands are in Korea...heh).
After a few failed attempts at making plans for an alternate to fly with me, it became clear that I would be the sole representative from Texas at FreedomCon. Since I don’t have anyone to stay with at this point, I d-mail Tim Guzman because I’d heard he had a slot open in his room. We agree to meet at the Norfolk airport Wednesday night. Anyway, playtesting time was virtually non-existent thanks to a daily schedule of full-time college and part-time work (I actually make A’s in school, so some of my day out of class is also devoted to it). I played in one local in the month of November, and that was pretty much all the playing I did. I know that playtesting is important, but I guess I’ve just been able to get by without it here in Texas. I thought my success was mostly due to my decks, but I would learn that my decks really weren’t as good as I thought they were (at least, they didn’t have the tech necessary to compete in a large environment). Anyway, my departure date rapidly approaches, and I prepare to leave. I fly out on Wednesday after attending one morning class.
I have a connecting flight in Houston, and when I arrive at the gate for my next flight, I notice a rather lanky fellow staring at me as I look for a seat. He continues to stare until I sit down. I sit in the same vicinity, and he continues to stare at me. I was beginning to wonder if I had landed in San Francisco and not Houston. Heh. But eventually, the guy says something. "Are you going to Freedom-Con?" I say ’yes’ and he then asks if I’m Justin Warren, as I guess he recognized me from my DeckTech picture. I again respond with a ’yes’ and he introduces himself as Hayes Hunter. He offers to play a game right there, and I accept. He stands up, and is freakin’ huge. I’m glad I didn’t spout off a smart-ass comment when he was staring at me. Heh. We start a game on the floor, my WYS Raiders against his Senate TIEs. We play only a few turns before the boarding call, but it appeared he would have owned me. We board, and talk for the entire flight to Norfolk. We arrive, and Hayes meets up with Steve Baroni, while I find Guzman and his crew waiting for their luggage. It looks like it’ll be Guzman, Shane Watner, Matt Berta, Brian Hunter, and I in the hotel. Cool. I really wanted to playtest with Hunter.
Guzman had rented a car, but Berta, Watner, and Hunter had taken the open slots, so Hayes, Baroni and I were without transportation to the hotel. But, Alex Tennet had given me the number for a transportation company that had a reasonable rate to the hotel, so Hayes called the number on the cell phone and we find their booth outside the airport. We split the fare and head to the hotel. We arrive in the FreedomCon area on the second floor, and Hayes and I finish our game, with him destroying me. I meet Tennet, a bloody good lad that I would spend much of the weekend hanging with. The Vegas guys and Hunter show up, and we hit the room, which has a spectacular view of the ocean. I play a game with my Hunt Down against Berta’s LS Combat deck, and I lose rather handily. This would be the beginning of my realization that the new LS Objective owns Hunt Down. Hunter thinks the new objectives will see a lot of play because new cards always do. I seem to agree because, hey, if there’s a deck that auto-wins over Hunt Down, I’m sure people will use it. I start to think I’m going to need a new dark deck, but am not quite sure what to use. Not much else happens before we crash.
Five hours later, it’s Thursday morning and the room is up. Time to start playtesting. Paul Myers shows up, and plays some games with Hunter. I play against Guzman with a jizzy QMC deck I built, and he owns me. I then throw together a DS Combat Racing deck similar to a deck I built for Jeremy when R3 was released, but Guzman owns that, too. So I’m starting to think that either my decks suck, I suck, or both. I start siphoning tech like a scrub of off Hunter, who had just beaten Myers’ DS and convinced him to build something new as well. Hunter would own the entire room in playtesting. So Hunter shows Myers a MKOS deck that looked pretty good. It had a huge space package that wrecked WYS, and the deck was also highly advantaged against Combat. So I looked over the decklist, even though I know I suck with Scum decks. I decided to use either the Scum deck, or a revised Hunt Down even though it’s @#$% against Combat. I work on the Hunt Down, but am not very happy with it. I playtest with my WYS more, and it does okay. I change some cards at Hunter’s advice, and my LS is set.
We go back to floor 2 and play more pickup games. I meet a lot of new people, like Andy Klema and Justin Desai. Both very cool guys. Before I know it, the day is gone and it’s time to party. Berta had brought some...uh...*cough* an alternative to beer, and he and I head over to Hayes’ room to have some fun. There’s plenty of beer too, and the room is loaded with a huge amount of players. There’s a few games going, but most are just kicking back and having a good time. I hang around with Martin Akesson for a bit, who tells me about how he owned Matt (Lush) back at ’99 Worlds. It was pretty funny. Then Mike Kessling shows up and we share a few laughs. A very cool kid. Later, he downs a couple shots and puts Baroni to shame by doing so, as Baroni was refusing to have any more alcohol despite the pressure from Hayes and everyone else. Kessling is only 15, and was taking the alcohol, so I think Baroni eventually succumbed and took some shots. It was pretty amusing. Alex and I just sat back and laughed while the party unfolded. Brits have a huge tolerance for alcohol, as Alex seemed fine the entire night, and he had been drinking all day apparently. Anyway, I’m out on Hayes’ balcony smoking with Kessling and some Brits, then Baroni comes running out the door puking. A dab of spittle gets on my hand, so that requires some hand washing. Baroni just unloads over the ledge, while everyone laughs. I think Desai took a picture. Heh. Kessling later notices some puke on his pant leg. He was pretty pissed, but it was funny stuff. A bit later, Hayes is pretty much out of his mind, and comes walking out on the balcony in Baroni’s puke barefooted. We tried to tell him what he was doing, but I think he had just a bit too much alcohol to really understand what we were telling him. Later, the party begins to die down, and Hayes passes out on the bathroom floor. I’m sure most of you have heard what happened to him later. Heh.
I lose track of Berta, who has the room key. So I just hang around Hayes’ room with Alex and Kessling, and drink some more. I eventually find Berta, but he disappears again while I’m distracted. I make sure Hayes is okay (breathing at least) before leaving, and Alex checks on him as well. I again find Berta, and we return to the room to find that Guzman and Hunter are gone. Berta gets the notion that they returned to a restaurant/bar we went to earlier, and decides we should walk there and find them. Alex comes along, but in our state of disarray, none of us thinks to first check to see if the rental car is gone before deciding to walk a couple miles. Heh. It was cold and I was barely coherent enough to walk straight, but we didn’t make it to the bar. Instead, we stopped at 7-11 as I had a mild case of the munchies. Berta and I snap into a Slim Jim and decide to walk back. Heh. We return and find Hunter and Guzman in the room, and had only went to another room to playtest. Whatever. So we get to bed late, and wake up early again. Ugh. I hate losing sleep, especially after substance night. Heh.
Friday is pretty much the same as Thursday, except no beer is involved because Day 2 is Saturday. I playtest a lot with Hunter, and he owns me in all but one game. I decide to go with Scum over Hunt Down at Hunter’s advice, but I add my own touch to the deck (which only seemed to hurt me in the long run). The day quickly disappears again, and I find myself scrambling to finish my decks and write decklists before getting to bed, which is around 4 a.m. again. Suck. Must...sleep...before...big...tournaments. But that night was damn funny, as we were picking on Akesson about his large set of teeth. Heh. No offense to Martin, he’s a cool guy and a hell of a player obviously, but our room found his dental appearance to be quite amusing. Heh. We began substituting the word "tooth" into card titles, and it was freakin’ hilarious. "Honor Of The Tooth." "My Tooth, Is That Legal?" "Let The Tooth Make The First Move." Heh. Then Hunter comes up with a nickname for Martin: Tooth Fairy. The room erupts in laughter, and then Hunter ponders a name to put on one of his decklists, and I suggest "Tooth Fairy Done RIGHT." More laughter explodes, and the we all eventually crash after laughing about tooth jokes. Heh. The funny thing is, Martin soundly defeated Tooth Fairy Done RIGHT the next day. Heh.
I feel fine the next morning, and go down and turn my decklists in. We go out for breakfast, but I just have a danish or something or other, and head back up. I meet Yannick Lapointe before going back inside; it was pretty cool to meet one of the best players in the history of the game. He’s a nice guy, too. Anyway, I stumble into the FreedomCon area and there’s an assload of people hanging around. I talk with some guys before the event gets started, including Hunter, who says he’ll be surprised if I don’t finish better than 4-4, which was my own prediction. My rating is 2049 going in. The pairings are announced, and Worlds begins.
[Game 1]
WYS vs. Jeff Holmes’ YMSYL
Jeff had qualified on Day 1 I think, and was one of Kessling’s friends. I get started fairly quickly, and attack and destroy his ZIMH early, which would hinder him in space for most of the game. I establish drains on Tatooine with I’ll Take The Leader and hold space with no problems, while Honor negates his YMSYL damage for several turns. I fulfill Battle Plan, while he doesn’t. Celebration hits, and I win the drain race fairly easily thanks to the BP/Menace Fades lock, as his Command engine was nowhere to be seen.
Full Win by 18
2 (+18)
I win Game 1, and am still feeling somewhat confident. Hunter surprisingly loses game 1, and to a deck he’s supposed to auto-win against.
[Game 2]
MKOS vs. Nick Jones’ HBX
I think Nick is the Washington State Champ, and he beat Baroni in Game 1. After seeing his Objective, I feel pretty confident, as Scum is supposed to own space decks. I set up aliens first turn in the AC, while he drops EPP Qui-Gon to the Desert Heart first or second turn. Suck. Menace Fades also hits the table, and he spreads his X-Wings very quickly in space. Here, I play my deck totally wrong, and it costs me the game in a single turn. Instead of beating on Qui-Gon and stopping Menace Fades, I go for a space beatdown because I have Blast Door Controls. But, he has Hyper Escape anyway, and I was using the old Ghhhk because it can be pulled with Masterful Move. Oh well. So, he drains for like 10, then 12, and that’s pretty much game. He retrieves 9 with All Wings Report In on his last turn to pump his differential.
Full Loss by 32
2 (-14)
Dammit, maybe I should’ve used Hunt Down (I’ve never lost to HB Flip with HD)...
[Game 2]
MKOS vs. Jason Kilby’s Lightsaber Combat
Jason reminded me of Jim Belushi. He was partying hardcore in Hayes’ room on Thursday night, and he’d also partied with Matt back at Worlds ’98 or something. Very cool guy. Anyway, Scum is again supposed to win this matchup, but let’s see how badly I can play the deck. I set up quickly, hoping to bluff that I am holding Barriers/NSP. He doesn’t buy it, brings some guys to the AC quickly, and kills my Gailid. Hunter suggested I use two Gailids, but I thought I’d be able to get by with one. Whoops. Anyway, I kill his guys, but without Gailid, I can’t drain for much. I play MM looking for my Ghhhk, but of course it’s not in my huge reserve deck. Oh well, I’ve still got Barriers to rely on. Ability, Ability, Ability comes out, and I decide to make an effort to retrieve Gailid using Scum/First Strike. He has a lone Corran Horn at one of his Naboo sites. I know he’s got some sort of battle avoidance card, but I’ll still get to retrieve for battling, so I drop P-59, battle, retrieve, and he Dodges away. I’m fine with that, as one more battle will get me Gailid back. Oh wait, he gets a turn now. I save three Force and am holding both of my Barriers, so I’m not worried. He brings EPP Luke on top of P-59. I Barrier. He grabs the Barrier. He drops EPP Han. I don’t Barrier. He drops Chewie, Enraged. I play Barrier, but don’t realize that it would require three Force to play instead of two because of his grabber. Suck. So I can’t Barrier, and he battles. Life Debt and few high destinies each at +2 aren’t good for me, and I lose 23 cards and essentially the game to battle damage. Damn that Ghhhk. I suck.
Full Loss by 29
2 (-43)
This is starting to look like what happened to Matt at Worlds...
[Game 4]
WYS vs. Steven Lewis’ Watto
Watto. Okay. Sure. Fine. Whatever. He starts No Escape much to my dismay, as my only real Watto defense is Honor. He flips quickly, and grabs my first It Could Be Worse. Dammit. He gets Lord Vader with Stick to Mos Espa with a POTF, and now it’s not looking too good for me because I’m not dealing nearly as much damage. I knock him out of space early, but he comes back and once he fulfills Battle Plan, my deck starts to spiral into oblivion. I can’t get anything going on the ground, even with Portal/Barrier backing me up. His damage/drains wear me down, and I start to regret not focusing on attacking his sites. A couple more turns of Watto damage and I’m done.
Full Loss by 17
2 (-60)
Holy s.hit, I haven’t lost three sanctioned games back-to-back since I can remember. Why is every-one at Worlds so good?
[Game 5]
MKOS vs. Cruger Dunn-Flanagan’s EBO
Why, it’s another deck that Scum is supposed to beat! How nice. I set up my aliens as usual, drawing for the space beats package. He sets up his EBO, and puts some ships out, which I attack with ZIMH and some destiny-adding guys on board. I draw at least three destinies, each at +2, while I cancel one of his with a Myo. The attrition takes a good deal of his fleet out, but he retaliates next turn with the Falcon combo and plays Legendary Starfighter after forcing me to lose a ship. But thanks to my attrition, Legendary does not go on the Falcon, instead on Red Squadron 1, I think. But it dealt its damage anyway, as he ran away from my ships for the most part. I think I Overloaded a Cannon later in the game, which sealed it for me. Nevertheless, I drain him out on the ground.
Full Win by 7
4 (-53)
Hey, the Scum deck won a game!
[Game 6]
WYS vs. Joseph Diniega’s Lightsaber Combat
I believe Joseph told me he was the Hawaii State Champ, but goes to college in Colorado. Anyway, I hadn’t had any problems against Combat with WYS before, so I maintain a good deal of confidence going into this game. This game was essentially a simple drain race, as I established my forces on Tatooine, while he stayed on Naboo. I retrieved, and he didn’t. I drained for more in the late game. A very simple game, really. Not much interaction that I can recall, a few early battles maybe, but nothing terribly significant.
Full Win by 14?
6 (-27?)
I seem to be back on track. Perhaps I can finish with a winning record...
[Game 7]
WYS vs. Matt Berta’s Hunt Down
Berta and I just screwed around for a large portion of this game, but I would play pretty crappy anyway (like forgetting for the ENTIRE GAME about not activating +1 for controlling systems. Hell, I think I did that all tournament. Whatever). He starts faster of course, like Hunt Down always does, and we stifle each other with Goo Nee Tay/Bad Feeling Have I. The lack of activation for both players inhibited both decks it seemed, as neither could pull off anything resembling a beatdown on the other. But Berta did manage to kill my EPP Luke with Coruscant Maul + I Have You Now following a They’re Still Coming Through! on my Barrier. I may have tried a Portal, too, but it wasn’t successful. Anyway, time runs out rather quickly, and before I can deploy my second Luke, time is called. Berta has more cards thanks to the Visage damage incurred for the last several turns. 17 to my 13. Oh well.
Timed Loss by 17
6 (-44?)
So much for that winning record...
[Game 8]
MKOS vs. Steven Lewis’ Throne Room Mains
This game was just terrible. My Scum deck was in no way prepared to face a deck that gives up no Force, starts Goo Nee Tay, pulls a first-turn Camp, and drops Padme and two Jedi into the AC on the second turn. That’s pretty much what happened. He played Revolution on the Desert Heart and the Lower Passages (illegally because of No Bargain, but it didn’t matter) to choke me further. For the first four or five turns, I just saved all of my active Force and let him drain me. I save up like 25+ and drop the new Boba, an Abyssin and I think Guri and Xizor for my entire Force pile save one card (for the battle). Lewis didn’t think I payed the proper amount, but he counted it and then apologized. So, I battle. I draw three destinies, and he loses his Padme and EPP Obi, while Boba and the Abyssin die. He kills Guri next turn, but I deploy another. However, that’s about the last thing I was able to deploy thanks to his massive choke (he was activating at least 20 per turn it seemed). So, he cleared me out and spread out with more characters, while I just drew up as fast as I could.
Full Loss by 32
6 (-76?)
Damn. I suck at this game.
Well, I finish at 3-5. Very disappointing, but I must admit that Worlds is a whole different ballgame from what I’m used to. I wasn’t prepared for that sort of competition. Yet, losing like that only makes me want to play more. How sad that the game is dying and this was probably the last Worlds.
The 8-man playoff begins, but I head up to the room and try to catch a little shut-eye, as I am slated to fly out at around 6 a.m. I sleep for like an hour, and Shane fills me in on what’s happened when I wake. He tells me that Hunter has lost to Bastian in the semifinals, and Akesson beat Hayes. Damn, a non-American final. I pack my stuff, and head down to the playing area to burn the 15 minutes I have remaining before heading to the airport. Bastian and Martin are playing game 2, and it appears Bastian has all but won. I say goodbye to many of the people that made the weekend fun for me, and go downstairs to wait for my transportation. There I meet Ryan Christian, with whom I split the cab to the hotel. Ryan informs me that he recently moved to Texas from Florida. Cool. I think I’m going to continue playing in what events I can, but I don’t see much (Decipher) SW:CCG after May of next year. Pity. We head out, and a couple hours of sleep later, I’m back in Texas.
PROPS:
David Akers and the DeckTech guys for organizing this event. I have thanks beyond words.
Tim Guzman, for hooking me up with a place to stay at the last minute.
Tim Guzman, for winning Day 1.
Brian Hunter, for the playtesting and deck advice.
Brian Hunter, for placing fourth.
Brian Hunter, for letting me borrow (and keep) some random cards for my MKOS.
Matt Berta, for the herbal vitamins. He knows what I mean. :)
Matt Berta, for being a cool dude to party with (that goes for so many people at Fcon...)
Shane Watner, for being smart enough to get more sleep than the rest of us. Heh.
Alex Tennet, for being a most decent and friendly chap (or should I say mate?) the entire weekend. The classiest fellow I met. Sorry you didn’t do as well as you would’ve liked.
Mike Kessling, for being a cool guy and for hooking me up with a few cigarettes when I was too lazy to go up to my room and get more. Better luck next year, dude.
Hayes Hunter, for the game and conversation. And for placing third, too.
Andy Klema, for wearing a Fight Club shirt AND a Fight Club pin on his Fight Club shirt. Heh. And for being a very cool guy to hang around. I appreciated your laid-back attitude. Very cool.
Justin Desai, Steve Baroni, and the rest of the Mass./Conn. crew, you guys rock.
Jeremy Losee and Brian Guthrie, for lending me cards before I left.
Matt Lush, just because he’s my friend and got screwed out of coming to this event. Perhaps there will be a next year, man.
Paul Myers, for placing second on Day 1.
Everyone who showed up and made this event possible.
Steven Lewis, for owning me.
Jason Kilby, for being a party animal and kicking my ass.
Yannick LaPointe, for being a friendly dude.
Ryan Christian, for helping run the event, and for the conversation.
Martin Akesson, for being a machine. And props to your teeth as well! A damn fine set...
Bastian Winkelhaus, for taking home the gold. Congratulations.
I’m sure I left someone out. I apologize in advance...
SLOPS:
Me, for sucking with MKOS. I should played Hunt Down anyway...
Me, for not representing Texas well.
Me, for losing an unthinkable amount of ratings points. Ah, who cares anymore?
Taco Bell, for forgetting to include a paid-for Quesidilla in our bag. The incompetence of fast-food workers is a ubiquitous phenomenon I suppose.
May the Tooth be with you!
Darwin bless. Hoostino out.