lancaster-12-29-01
Title: lancaster-12-29-01
Author: Rypcord "Rypcord" Kline
Date: Dec 30, 2001
Friday, was the last day of Twilight Games. We’re all hanging out, and I’m packing up all my belongings {like my 6 some Warhammer 40K tanks, and other minitures}, and Drew calles James to see what time Mike’s tournament is. While Drew’s on the phone, James tells him about how Big Old D lost the StarWars license. GHEEEEETO.
We find out the tournament begins at 11:00 AM and we soon say good-bye for the last time with most of the people from Twilights for the perhaps the last time ever. We all take one peice of the shop of our choice. Though my Kitchen Table is still there.....
Saturday Morning: Pennyslvania
{I always wanted to use one of those headings like you see in the Movies}...
My parents drive us over to the Warehouse where we play, but, being that its like 9:30, its too early so we drive around and come to a Mikky D’s. This is the best McDonalds EVER! It has this Ronald McDonald without a head, {rather humerous}, and theres also N64 games in the Play area! We’re like... wow, Holy Sh!t! They have, Elmo’s Adventures, Micky’s Racing, and Mario GoKarts. It was cool... except the analog sticks on the Mario GoKart controllers were as limp as a 90 year old man..... but anyway.
Finally, we show up to the place at about 10:30 and Micky and James is waiting there for us. We get dropped off. And like 2-5 minutes later Mike Carr shows up with his girlfriend. I get a few key cards from Mike {big thanks there}. And I’m set.
Decks:
Light Side: My latest Reincarnation of all those crazy Droid Decks: Kessel Hold
Dark Side: Same old Senators with a few changes.
The tournament begins.
Game 1: My Dark Side vs. Micky {James} Lightsaber Combat
His real name is James, but James Leiser always calls him Micky, so I don’t know what the hell is going on. So I just never reference him by name. Heh. He draws no Jedi in his opening hand, and I draw no Senators in my opening hand. It takes me 2-3 turns to flip, and soon, he finally gets a Qui-Gon {Ref3} to the 3/2 Naboo site. He gets a good drain in, and I drain at the GS, and I continue to hit him with Yeb Yeb {he’s the freken man!}. I drop Coruscant Maul with Double Bladed. Chop up Qui-Gon. He loses some, I lose like none, 4-Lom helps me out with this task. But, he uses his cancel Targeting cards {the one that requires me to spend 2 force, and Lightsaber Block or whatever its name is.... its from Jabba’s Palace}. Later, he drops another Qui-Gon, drops a combat card. He Combats Maul, I lose and lose 2. We continue to fight, Mara comes down. Ref3 Leia comes down to try and add to drains, but he forgets about Lott Dodd’s ability, and thinks because I have no hand its bad for me so he leaves her alone. I use Lott Dodd, get Darth Vader, drop him. Battle. I Have You Now. He loses her, and some. I move him over with Mara who has her saber. They battle and eventually, hes left to just Tatooine Qui-Gon, against my Maul and 4-Lom. I wreck Qui-Gon, I lose 4-Lom, and he loses 7 off top for some reason. At this point, Yeb Yeb, has killed 2 Jedi Knight Luke’s with his ability. =-). Finally, I lose Maul {Knight Luke with Saber chops him}, so I FINALLY REMEMBER THE PHANTOM MENACE! And I place it in my Used Pile. Then, he flips, and on his turn, and he Fingers of Death Mara. Thats pretty much the game. I’m draining for 1, and he’s draining for 4 {2 which I can block}. Finally, he drains me out.
FL 0 {-7}
DAMN LIGHTSABER COMBAT OBJECTIVES! Damn you!
Game 2: My Lightside Deck vs. Mike Wicky’s DARK SIDE Combat
Damnit! Not another frikken one! I don’t get Kessel out until VERY VERY Late. I never seem to get any ships or characters to use with my Squadron Assignments.
First turn, he has no lost pile, and all he has in play is Lord Maul. I’m sitting on EPP Luke, and an Out of Commission/TT. So, I figure, I’ll battle old Maul, chop him up, and just lose Luke to the attrition, not bad. Then place Maul out of play, and thats pretty much it for him. I drop him. Battle. He plays Stunning Leader. Hmmm.... suck. His turn, Finger of Death.... POOF, no more Luke. Two turns later, I have the same combo in my hand.... I’m like.... hmm.... I drop EPP Luke. Battle. Stunning Leader. His Turn. Poof. No Luke. Hmmm..... this is just bad. There goes my Lukes. I don’t remember much of the rest of this game. I just know I Catch a hardcore style beat-down from like Chimera with Grand Admiral Thrawn.
FL 0 -22 {0} (-29)
Well, if I ever direct a tournament, those damn objectives aren’t allowed! Damnit!
Game 3: My LS vs. Gay Steve’s DS Ties
I am not going to lose to him.
I am not going to lose to him.
I am not going to lose to him.
I just kept repeating this in my head. I will not lose. I amazingly draw my R2 in Red 5, like turn 2 for my Training, so there we go, I’m done with that. He drains at Endor for like 1 turn, which I drop "They Win This Round", and then I It Could Be Worse it so I don’t take any. They Win This Round is T3CH with Great Warrior. They Win This Round, allows him to drain +1 there, but my destinies are +1 there, and when I control it, I retreive 4, {and due to Great Warrior, he doesn’t get that +1 drain bonus.... hehe....}, its Ben Mexican tech!
Anyway, so, he drops like every Tie he plays with there, to make sure he holds it, so I don’t retreive my 4. So.... its worth it, just for that then. I control his Hoth, his Kashyyyk, and my Kessel, so I’m draining for 3/2/2. He usually blocks my 3 with Dreaded Fleet. And he takes 4, and then he like deploys 4 tie interceptors to retreive it all. Finally, he decides to be bold, and he deploys Lateral Damage unto my RADIANT SEVEN.... LOL! Radiant Seven is immune to the Lateral Damage due to me having Cpt. Madakor, and Lt. Williams on it. We have a few battles, where I obliterate him. I think Gay Steve tried to have some tech, cuz he placed Lat Damage on Waklumi to try and lure me there to cancel it, and catch a beat-down from him. But I didn’t have to go there anyway due to the Radiant being immune to it. One time, he leaves a lone Tie Interceptor with lasers with a Dreadnaught. I use Squassin to flash my EPP Luke, to pull out R2 in Red 5, and drop them there. Drop the X-Wing Lasers. Battle. I shoot and force him to lose the Tie with Lasers. Then I Power Pivot the Dreadnaught. He loses like 12 from it. Finally, Mike says theres 8 minutes left. I figure I can take him, he only has like 12 force. My turn. Force drain for 2. It takes him 3 minutes to decide what to lose. I’m like, "MARK.... stop STALLING!" He’s like, "I’m Not stalling.... I’m thinking!". So I get really pissed off, "Just lose something! Damnit! Hurry up, a timed win screws everyone over!" And he’s like.... "ooh... screwing....". I was like....
GAY.
But I chose not to say it.
Finally, time runs out. I On the Edge for 4 more force, and he Short Ranges for 3.
Timed win. 18 to 13.
TW. 1 +18 {1} (-11)
So, due to the Timed game, I end up having to play him again, GAY.
Game 4: My DS vs. his LS HB {that he never seems to remember to flip}
Its not a matter of him chosing not to flip or to flip, but he just forgets. He plays with a system of every parsec in both his DS and his LS deck just so that he can always move "just in case". Also, both games, whenever you deploy something he "deems worthy" he says "exceeelent" and he draws it out like something Homer Simpson would say, so he sounds even more astoundingly gay. I flip first turn, due to my Drawing Lott Dodd and Orn Free.I also drop my 3/2 Naboo site.On his turn, he drops Kiffex, Kessel, Hoth, and Tatooine. I’m like, Oooky.... my turn, I activate 13 force. I drop Yeb Yeb. And from this point on, I Yeb Yeb him every turn. I drain him at the Galactic Senate, and I battle his lone X-Wing with my Bossk in Hounds Tooth. He plays Hyper Escape. So, I sense it. I lose the sense, and the 2 force due to his combo card. But, he ends up losing the ship, and 7 more due to me drawing the Emperor {destiny 6 Empy}. He drops EPP Leia, EPP Han, and ECC Chewie to the Naboo site. I drop 4-Lom, Old School Premier Vader, and Ref3 Fett. I battle, I first shoot EPP Han with 4-Lom. Then, I play I Have You Now. He shoots 4-Lom and Fett. I draw for destiny:
3 {Sense Combo} 1 {Tat Darth Maul} 1 {Tat Darth Maul} 1 {Mara Jade}. So, they become a 4/2/2/2 due to Vader’s GT. DAMNIT. Damn 1’s. Oh well. He ends up losing ECC Chewie, and EPP Leia. I’m like.... ok. I only lose Fett and 4-Lom. My turn, I use Lotti Doddi to get Mara Jade. Use Mara to get Saber. Battle. Chop Han. He misses the shot. And he loses Han, and some. Next turn, he does nothing. I drop Emperor. To make sure I own it. I then drop Fett in Slave 1 and Zuckuss in Mist Hunter against his 3 X-Wings. So he loses them and a Houjix due to my destiny of 5. Finally, the drain of 3 at the Naboo site, and the 1 at the Senate, and the 2 at Kiffex from Bossk, and then finally the 2 at his Hoth just killed him.
Full Win 2 +18 {3} (+7)
Not very good in general. I get 2 Picks out of Mike’s binder. I get a FOIL Janus and a FOIl Scum.
I try out my expiremental Scoop.Dec Edge that Busted Wide Open’s the opponent on Drew. It does decently well agaisnt 2MPT {2 Man Power Trip} [this was who the deck was designed to beat], but he catches it hardcore style to D-Von. Then, finally Drew’s dad picks us up after we check out the Comic store in some hope of getting Survivor Series, no such luck. I do pick up the latest Raw magazine since it has a huge section devoted to Stone Cold and Debra....’s Puppies. heh.
We go to this store in the Harrisburg East Mall. Drew buys like 3 packs of Survivor Series. Pulls 2 Samoan Drops and an Attitude Adjustment. The new Step Aside picture is awesome! So I "yoinked" that from him, same with Roll out of the way {RHYNO IS ON IT!!!!} and the new JR is a great pic too. But, I think the new best pic is the Puppies, since its like an upclose pic of Debra’s tits. What could be better?
We play a few games there, I destroy Rory with my 2MPT, and I destroy Drew with my 2MPT, I didn’t get to test out my Benoit though, and Drew destroys my Edge. Though, my Edge does do decently well against Rory’s BoD deck.... mainly due to him never drawing a Just Bring It. Then we do a Triple Threat, and Edge and Christian {Rory} plus D-Von {Drew} basically make it into a Handicap match agaisnt my 2MPT deck, and they just barely beat me. With Drew ending up with 1 card left, and Rory with 12 cards left before I die. And then Drew beats Rory due to him drawing the 3 Throws and the 3 SuperPlexes.
Then he realize how bad this store SUXS DONKEY TESTICLES! They have like FIVE Magic Booster Drafts going on. And every guy there thinks that Raw Deal sucks. I’m like, whatever. Every guy there Reeked of a fatty kinda smell. All the guys were either White Skinny little Eminem style people who think they were black or were huge Fat White people with like Chicken legs sticking out of their mouths.
And thats the end of my day...
Props:
For mike for running the tournament.
For James for being cool.
For Drew’s dad for not being a jack-ass like mine, and giving us a ride home.
For Rory getting back into the game.
Slops:
For Gay Steve being gay.
For the gay Lightsaber combat objectives.
For the sh!tty store.
For my sh!tty Light Side deck.
FOR GAY STEVE BEING GAY.
Gay Steve’s Quotes of the day:
Back-story:
We’re saying alot of South park Quotes, and the one is about Butters and Male Gay Pornos. Butters says he was forced to see the ninth one. Gay Steve speaks up from the back of the room.... "they never made 1 through 8". {IT WAS SO GAY}
"Exceeeelent" {with a Homer Simpson sounding voice} everytime you deploy a card.
"Oooh.... that card’s phat." {He’s 40 freken years old!}
"Guess what me and Drew did last night.... the hippity Jippity!!!" {Yea.... ok, he didn’t say that one....}
Ideas for what Decipher can do now without the SW License:
James, Drew, Rory, Micky, Mike, and I all came up with an idea to have Decipher make a Space Balls expansion. Similar to Unglued in Magic, but actually DECENT and PLAYABLE cards and have it be compatible with SWCCG. We came up with some good cards:
"She’s Gone from Suck to Blow!"
Epic Event: "Combing the Desert"
"I Told You Never to Use this Video!"
Yogurt
Barf
Darth Helmet
all the characters.... etc.
I honestly think its a great idea.
D-Mail me if ya want my Edge deck idea, or if you have any ideas for the SpaceBalls expansion.
Well thats my TR. Hope you enjoyed it.
-Signing out from what perhaps might be the last SW tournament EVER.
--Ben Mexican